Even so, today while I was talking to my friend Zoe, I realized a rather peculiar similarity between these three women. The first one is that I met all of them in one of my history classes. This did not occur in the same year by the way, it’s over a span of four years now. The history class similarity led me to ask another question: What the hell?
Prof: And SA soldiers were posted outside of Jewish stores. However, the boycott on Jewish products was largely unsuccessful because it was inconvenient to...
Lauren’s Mind: Hmmm... she is really interesting. Hey Brain, did you know she speaks three languages?
Lauren’s Brain: Hey Mind! Get out of the gutter and pay attention! You’ve already missed the date of the boycott and now you don’t know what else the Nazis pulled on the Jews prior to 1938. I have to control all of Lauren’s stupid impulses. Don’t go making my job harder!
Lauren’s Mind: I wonder where she’s from... Oh right, uh... boycott.
Doesn’t make sense and it’s quite horrible isn’t it? Same thing happened with the French Revolution although I know that started in 1789 as well as the battle of Ypres in 1915. Some stuff gets through. I don’t know what it is about mass murder, beheadings and battles where toxic gases were used for the first time, but seems that I always find some girl to think about. This is also three different classes. Of course, the last two girls ended up being more than “some girl”.
Lauren’s Theories to Explain History Class Phenomenon:
- Admin places all women attractive to Lauren in her history classes.
- All women attractive to Lauren have an interest in history
- Lauren gaps out in history
- Strange gas is released in Lauren’s history classes turning all her thoughts toward women
- Lauren is just weird
That’s all I’ve got. I guess my type is History Nerd? Other similarities are that they’re all older than me except for one who was two months younger. They’re all brunettes with similar a skin tone and all three are very clever and witty. I could go on but if I say much more I’ll start to gush and then I’ll want to throw up.
So... weird right? I’m not the only one thinking this is weird am I? I mean, my other major is English and I’ve never really been interested in an English major. I smell a conspiracy! Actually... I smell soap. I just got out of the shower.
If you choose to answer my questions, keep it clean people. Or use creative euphemisms. I like euphemisms. Euphemism is a cool word.