The weather here is absolutely craptastic. Sometime around six tonight the wind knocked out our satellite. That means no TV for Lauren. Yippee! On the upside, it was the kick in the pants I needed to get back to writing. I ended up rewriting part of chapter nine. I was just not happy with the “jail break” scene. It was too easy. It may still be too easy but it’s much better than it was. I’m too lazy to fix it again now. I then started chapter ten in which I will be laying out the larger part of the evil plan to take over the world. That’s not exactly the plan... it’s on a smaller scale.
Other than that, I’ve been avoiding Freud all day. Wherever I am he seems to pop up just before me. It’s starting to creep me out. Even Meeko is alarmed. Of course, he slept through Freud’s little makeover so he isn’t being targeted for revenge. Even if he was being targetted, he has a secret weapon that I don’t. I think it’s due to his treats, but my God! Meeko has horrendous breath. I brush my teeth regularly and can’t say I share this similarity.
MEEKO GLARES.
Lauren: When you’re on one end of the couch cleaning yourself and I’m on the other watching TV and I can smell it your breath wafting over there is no way to deny it. PAUSE. Is there something dead in there?
MEEKO TURNS AWAY, HIS BUTT NOW POINTED AT LAUREN.
Lauren: Nice. Thank you. I have Freud making me absolutely paranoid and now you have your ass pointed at me. You know if you fart and open your mouth at the same time I might die. And then who’ll feed you? Think about it before you do it.
MEEKO YAWNS
Lauren: You totally don’t care do you? You’d probably eat me... starting with my feet.
Freud INTERRUPTING: So, you are paranoid? Zis iss a good sign.
Lauren: Why is that a good sign?
Freud: Because I heve no intention of tellink you vhen I vill strike. Vhen I vill exact my revenge and humiliate you. Ze date, ze time and ze method vill be unknown to you until it iss too late! Mwahahahaha!
Lauren: The evil laugh is a bit much don’t you think? Seriously, it’s not that bad. Most of the dye has come out.
Freud: Oh, it iss zat bad. I hed to see ozer clients like zis. Vith ze green in my beard and ze Mohawk on my head. Zey vere less zan impressed.
Lauren: Just tell them you were trying to gain the trust of a patient who escaped from a hair styling academy. There is no need to get me back.
Freud: Zhere iss a need. And ze need vill be filled. I hope you are ready vhen it happens.
Well... that didn’t help me at all. So long as he doesn’t team up with Rochester I think I’ll be fine. Who am I kidding? Rochester can’t resist a prank! Meeko, I’m sticking with you. Where you go I go. And if they come at me, just keep hissing, that’ll propel your bad breath, knock them out and give us time to run away. Do we have a deal?
MEEKO YAWNS AND GOES TO SLEEP, LEAVING THE SURROUNDING AIR SMELLING AWFUL.
Oh good. So long as we agree.
Lauren.
Well to start off, I’m really quite sure that your bad breath isn't related to you quitting smoking going on a diet or any other “fad” reason. And it's also most likely not related to you having gastrointestinal problems (though it could be in very rare cases).
ReplyDeleteQuick question, how long have you had bad breath? If you get bad breath most of the time it's a sure sign of bacterial imbalance. If you’ve had bad breath for over 3 months it shows bad breath has taken a firm foothold that will take more than a “special” mouth wash to get rid of.
There's a lot of stuff out there that claims to cure bad breath but the ONLY thing I've found (I’ve spend $400+ trying to find it) that actually works is CHEAP, and readily available online.
It's called OralTech Labs. I could explain more but suffice to say they do research which they publish as advice. You follow the advice which is not fun but it gets rid of bad breath and that’s what matters to me and probably you.
Just google OralTech Labs and take it from there.
Hope this helps you out. Justin Morrison, Salt Lake City.
Bad Breath & Halitosis Cures: Thanks. I'll let Meeko know immediately. Although, he is a cat so bad breath is probably normal. My breath is fine, but thanks for your concern.
ReplyDelete