The Bully Question

I’m told the BEd experience depends largely on spending time with your section. Sections are like… homeroom classes. We have five classes in which we’re all together. Outside of those we have four or five classes that focus on our subject areas or topics of interest.

  

That’s what’s supposed to happen. What actually happens is rather more… interesting and shockingly ordinary. Because you’re together with the same people day in and day out, you form friendships, you fall into cliques. Some people you like. Other people’s voices make you want to jump out a window. The other thing that happens is bullying. I find that hilariously ironic.

We had an incident of bullying today in one of my classes (first bit of irony: it happened in spec ed). One of my classmates made a snide comment about another. He was extremely loud and he made his comment in front of our entire section. Our professor wasn’t in the room at the time as we were filling in professor evaluation forms. Forty of us looked up all wondering what the hell was going on. It was just that random. The student the comment was directed at promptly left the room. We were all still staring at the person who made the comment. I called him a douche. A girl sitting in the middle of the class reprimanded him far more effectively. Later, as I was leaving, I found the girl in the bathroom (we always wind up there don't we?) and was surprised but also pleased to see her surrounded by four other girls. One of her male friends had sent her a text message asking if she was okay and apologized for not being female and allowed in the girl's room.

I think this highlights another terrible shortcoming of the BEd experience. We are constantly being told that we can’t put our students in a position where they will feel stupid. We can’t tolerate bullying of any kind. We have to make our classrooms safe, welcoming, inclusive places. Yet here we are, adults who have allegedly matured and learned to control our impulses, doing the same thing kids would. We’re doing things we’re being specifically trained to spot, stop and avoid. Weird isn’t it?  

I recognize the cliquish nature of the program and I’m trying to stay out of it. I don’t engage in anyone’s drama, I don’t sit in a regular place, I don’t avoid talking to anyone. Then again, I’m not naturally a social person so that works for me. I don’t know… if I were more social, I don’t know that I would be able to stay out of the drama.

Is that a Darwinian thing? No matter how old we are, no matter how mature and evolved we think we are,  we’ll seek to have power over others and gain that power by belittling. The weak will be crushed at the hands of the strong? Is bullying then a natural impulse? Are we fooling ourselves by thinking a bully-free world is possible? What is bullying if not aggression and a desire to dominate through intimidation? How much more animal (and therefore natural) can it get?


That's my question for today. So I'm clear, I absolutely do not condone bullying. I was bullied for a long time by a variety of people. I know what it feels like and I would never want anyone to go through that. I'm just wondering if we can ever expect bullying to stop. 


Lauren.