The Porn Scenarios

I now present you with my teacher's dilemma. I finished grading that science test and the last half did much better than the first. So now I'm going through all of them again to see if I was just in a pissy mood yesterday. I don't think I was... I was discouraged by the time I quit, but that shouldn't make me want to grade my students low. That shall be for tomorrow.

I went out for supper with Jenny today! YAY! I really appreciate any time I can spend with adults these days. And if those adults are my friends, well that like a double bonus. If that adult is my friend and likes to swear, now that is fantastic to me. I always feel like a hypocrite telling kids to watch their language when I'm internally swearing my head off while trying to remember where I put my damn chalk down. Actually, when I'm done BEd, I think I'm going to do something along these lines:

That'll be nice.

Anyway, I went out with Jenny! On top of having a lovely dinner, I also got to witness her using her blonde powers. It's a real thing, don't question me. She's a cute, confident, little blonde and she's always got guys falling over themselves to help her. Today, it was changing her headlights and putting air in her tire. I just stood there. As I do.  I happened to find the whole scenario rather amusing. We both did and were apparently both on the same page because as soon as we were back in her car, she looked at me and said: "And that's how porn movies start".

And it very easily could have deteriorated to a porn-like situation. I'll show you what I mean. In writing. No one wants to see that video.

Scenario A

Jenny walks authoritatively up to the counter. She's wearing a purple dress with buttons. She knows one of the buttons tends to pop open as it did earlier while at dinner with Lauren. When she arrives at the desk, the clerk looks up. Jenny smiles her cute-blonde smile and says: "I need you to take a look at my headlights". He looks down and sees that her button has popped open again. He thinks it's a euphemism. Porn occurs.

Scenario B

Jenny decides that she needs air in her front tire. The one mechanic hands her the pump and gauge. Jenny crouches down in her heels and dress and proceeds to attempt her task. Meanwhile, another mechanic rushes forward, claiming that the pump is broken. He crouches down to help her. The first mechanic is still standing behind her. Porn occurs.

Scenario C

Jenny and Lauren get back into Jenny's car and wait several awkward moments for one of the mechanics to open the garage door. Both fear the threat of porn occurring.

What actually happened:

Jenny approached the counter with her usual confidence and cute-blondness. She was wearing a purple dress with a faulty button. The mechanic agreed to show her how to fix the headlights. He helps change one headlight while Jenny fixed the other. I stood there thinking up porn scenarios apparently. Once that was complete, Jenny realized she forgot to put the cover on behind the bulb. The mechanic laughs good-naturedly and replaces the cover for her. Jenny decided she needed more air in her tire. We were in the presence of the right equipment so why not? She's handed the pump and gauge. Another mechanic rushes over to help her. And yes, she was wearing heels and a dress and crouching. The first mechanic watched them work. Jenny and Lauren get back in the car, hoping the garage door will open before the porn music starts. It does, and they drive away laughing. Lauren contemplated locking the doors just to be safe.

I love hanging out with people my age!

Lauren.