If I Could Lie

I have a pretty wicked bruise on my forehead from literally and accidentally head-deasking. Yes, head-desk is now a verb. After the pain of hitting my face subsided, I felt the emotional pain that comes with embarrassment. I'm pretty good at managing that one. I felt like I'd fallen into/out of (I'm not sure which, depends on the day) a Three Stooges show. Slapstick humour at its finest. So, for all the doubters out there, some people (me) do bend over to pick things up and smash their heads into things on their way down.

The upside is that my eyebrow is hiding the majority of the bruise. Which is a good thing primarily because I don't want to have to admit to how I got the bruise in the first place. Yes, I realize lying is an option, but I'm just so bad at it there's not much of a point. For example, top three excuses off the top of my head (ha, pun)

1) Hobo knife fight
2) Meeko tried to kill me because I didn't turn the water on
3) Won a door prize. The guy was drunk and not paying attention.

For any of these be believable I would have to:

a) Leave my house.
b) Have a spiteful cat and Meeko's not spiteful. Sure he holds a grudge for a bit too long, but he's a softy and will give in for belly-rubs.

See, told you I'm a bad liar. I'll say I have a concussion and it's affecting my ability to think clearly.

Incidentally, I have had a concussion before. Want to know how it happened? I was playing around with a soccer ball in my backyard after travelling for eight and a half hours in a car. I didn't know it had rained for a significant portion of the day at home. My shoes had no tread. I slipped in the grass, tripped over the deck and bashed my head into the chimney. I don't remember tripping, falling or getting up. All I remember is that when I could see again, I was kneeling, holding my head and swearing. So, I guess I'd also like to know what happened even though I'm pretty sure my assumption is correct. Due to a temper tantrum earlier in the day, my parents thought I did it on purpose. And I was the one who was concussed... really. This is also a story I would like to lie about. If you were wondering why I felt the need to retell it.

Aside from marvelling at my own clumsiness and stupidity, I procrastinated. I'm almost halfway through Catching Fire, the second book in The Hunger Games series. I was finally informed that I was reading the books out of order. Yet another ditz move on my part. I really don't know how I didn't realize sooner. Luckily, I didn't get very far, but still... Even though the timeline wouldn't allow for it, I'm going to claim concussion again.

Isn't having an imagination great!

Lauren.