How do I feel about exams? Behold! One thousand words!
I love that movie. Kind of makes me want a dragon. Alas, the only dragons I know are still tragically in human form. Because everyone knows that dragons hide in plain sight. As do unicorns if you watch Glee. Their horns are retractable. Duh.
So I studied today. I opened my books, made some notes, read over stuff, remembered stuff. And got bored. But then I remembered that my exam is tomorrow. So I reopened my books, continued my notes, read a little. And got bored. As always, I procrastinated. This time, I played a game that involves racing cats through a house. Catnip gives you boosts of speed but there are also weapons to be weary of. I'm talking serious shit here. Laser pointers, balls of yarn, dog holograms and firecrackers that make a lot of noise and scare the crap (not literally) out of your cat. The first two are mere distractors but still effective. But naturally, I returned to my studies! After winning four races and testing out my new cat on all the courses.
Basically, every time I would start reading over my stuff, I would realize that I knew it. And I do. However, I'm painfully aware that when I sit at my wobbly desk tomorrow and meticulously organize my pencils and straighten everything to 90 degree angles and finally get the okay to turn the damn exam over, that I'm going to be stumped by some questions. What? You don't have an exam ritual where you straighten everything and lay everything out so that it's just so? Weird...
I'm not nervous exactly. I've written dozens of exams by now. I know how it works. It's just that... I'm so over this year that I'm a bit worried about whether my attitude is more indifferent than prepared. For me, the two can feel remarkably similar. At least, they do when I get my results back. Either way, by noon tomorrow it'll be over and it won't matter anymore.
What more needs to be said?