What To Do with Lemons

I'm sure at some point, we've all heard the saying "When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade". I got curious and started looking for the origin of this saying. I lost my patience before finding an answer. Why was I interested in this saying? Because it was a "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade"kind of day. To be frank, I'm starting to feel more like my life is a series of "God is a bully with a magnifying glass and I'm his favourite ant" kinds of days. But that's beside the point. We're talking about lemons.

So, what do you do when life gives you lemons?

Here's my suggestion. CAUTION: FOUL LANGUAGE AHEAD.

You take the lemons and carefully cut them in half. When all your lemons have been halved, you pick them up and with as much aggression as possible, whip them back at life. It will probably help if you say something along the lines of:


"Take your fucking lemons because I refuse to settle for the shitty-ass hand you've dealt me. Now fuck off!" 


And hopefully, you've hit life square in the face, causing the acidic juices to escape the lemon halves, enter and burn life's eyes out. 

I found this after I wrote my post. Clearly I'm not the only one receiving a lot of lemons. 

This philosophy is called: Succeeding in spite of all the people who try to screw with you.

Pros: You eventually get what you want, you learn an awful lot along the way, you get to point and laugh and all the people who dared get in your way.

Cons: You will become jaded and when the moment comes, you likely won't want to point and laugh at the people who attempted to screw with you.


I have mastered this philosophy. The only remaining thing I want to tell life at the moment? Kiss my ass and come get your damn lemons because I've no use for them!

As you can see, I haven't had a very good day. I spent the day venting, I'm going to go to bed early, I'm going to wake up in the morning, I'm going to pick myself up and I'm going to move on and do what I do best. Because that's what you do. You don't take the lemons. You don't make lemonade.

Lauren.