I went through day one of phase two of the daycare interview process. They were going to evaluate how I worked with the kids today. That was after I read a two inch thick binder about the daycare's policies and other government documents. Remember how I said I read slow? Took me three and a half hours. Only an hour and a half longer than it was expected to take me. I may or may not have dozed off... I'm not entirely sure. In my defence, it was hot, I was tired, the government stuff was really dry. AND DOUBLE SIDED! Thank God for the phone ringing.
I know it took way longer than expected because I as soon as I was done, I got an hour long lunch break.
The afternoon portion of my day was the reason for my Howard Hughes routine upon returning home. Not that Howard Hughes would probably be caught dead (ha?) in a daycare. I was not working with babies. Woot! I got to work with "pre-schoolers". They can walk, they can talk and the majority of them are on good terms with the toilet. I can do this.
So, here are some of the things I learned at daycare:
- "We aren't allowed to go outside, it's too hot" translates to "You're my new jungle gym".
- Making a giant stick out of markers stuck together cap to end makes you a friggin' genius.
- Corners are evil. Kids always cry when they leave them.
- I am a mobile piece of furniture.
- Getting kicked in the crotch is not a possibility. It's a guarantee to the power of ten.
- Glasses are really targets. Fists and feet! Aim for them!
- Kids like to stick toys in their mouths and proudly offer them up to you afterward.
- You're going to get flashed.
- Kids are easily distracted. When they're upset, point out the pretty pony!
And most importantly:
10. Kids are adorable, sweet, funny, intelligent creatures. But they're also disgusting.
I got home covered in fluids that were not mine. I'm mostly talking spit/drool but I wouldn't discount the very strong probability of boogers. I can't even count the amount of toys I literally had shoved in my face. I refer you back to #7 to underline the ickiness of having toys shoved in my face. I got sick in February and it was bad. I don't want to get sick again. Summer colds are always the worst. I don't know why, but that's how it is.
It was a lot to get used to. It was very different from anything I've done. But I did have fun. And in spite of being gross, the kids truly were adorable, funny, clever, very sweet little people. Plus, I'm absolutely exhausted so I'm hoping for a really good night's sleep. Back at it tomorrow and then it will be decided if I'm hired or not.