I liked to think that there's an opportunity every day to meet someone new and interesting. Given that I started a new class today, I was in pretty good shape with regards to meeting new people. I'm sure they're interesting too but I don't really know them yet.
My first interesting encounter did not however occur at school. I was driving up to school via the highway. There are less traffic lights, no crazy traffic circles and as a result of taking the highway, I can go thirty km faster. Which is fun. After the highway, I must turn off onto an old country road. It's paved, but it's surrounded by old farm houses, bush, marshy ground. The road is a mess, potholes everywhere, ruts more like chasms, it's bad.
So, while I was swerving on the road to avoid the worst of the road damage, a friggin' rabbit jumps out at me. He hopped halfway across the road and froze right in front of me. I love animals. I flicked my gaze up into my rearview mirror. Since no one was behind me, I slammed on the brakes. The stupid rabbit didn't move. I kept getting closer and closer until I couldn't see him anymore. It took a second or two but the idiot hopped back into the bush. YAY! I avoided being a murderess! I thought deer were the ones that froze. If not what the hell does the expression "deer in the headlights" mean?!
After a few deep breaths and a quick thanks to God for allowing me to continue my day without having smooshed a cute little bunny, I started moving again. I didn't get two feet ahead before the same damn rabbit jumps out in front of me again. Slam go the brakes! It instantly hopped back. I decided it would be best to roll forward until I'd passed him. I got to school without further incident.
Clearly that bunny had a big mouth. He went and told all his woodland/marshland friends that the chick singing loudly to the radio in the grey car wouldn't hit little critters. She's kind. She'll brake. It might be close, but she won't hit you. The evidence is there. As I was driving home, a little chimunk charged out in front of me. I had to slow down, but to his credit, he didn't stop. One more critter to be hit another day by another driver. Though, I would rather they didn't get hit at all.
I hate driving. I like the independence, I like the efficiency, I hate when things jump out in front of me. Thankfully, I don't know of any drive through haunted houses.
Lauren.
Monday, April 30, 2012
Does Your Brain Need a Vacation?
I had a thought-free day. What does a thought-free day look like? I shall show you.
See that. Nothing.
The benefits of a thought-free day are numerous. In fact, nine out of ten mental health professionals agree that a thought-free day is beneficial to the improvement of mood, energy levels, overall productivity and of course, general happiness. The improvement to happiness is so significant that it has its own category outside of mood. In addition, thought-free days are shown to decrease stress by nearly 80% if performed following a list of highly specialized doctor's instructions.
If the health benefits weren't enough, the positive effect stress-free days have on free time is astounding. With the reduction of stress and increased mood and energy levels, accomplishing any pleasure oriented task becomes a breeze.
But wait! If you order now, I'll personally ship you my Guide to Thought-Free Living. It's a best seller in my mind which is the most important part of the thought-free process. In fact, I wrote it while not thinking!
If you'd like to experience this wonderful state of being, read this post over again, and again, and again because I am not saying a damn thing. Just sit back, relax and let your mind go blank with Lauren Daily. It could be your experiment.
Salem: CUT!
Lauren: What? What was wrong with that one?
Lord Voldemort: Is this really necessary? Have we really run that low on funds?
Brain: Yes.
Salem: I told you not to swear. You swore on your line about not thinking.
Lauren: You're going to have to be more specific. That whole thing was about not thinking.
Salem: Just take it from the top.
Pinky: There is no top! That's the beauty of Smelly Cat! NARF!
Salem: I bathed this morning thank you! My leg is still sore from stretching that far!
Lauren rolling her eyes: It's a Friends reference...
Lord Voldemort: Can we get back to this? I have a support group meeting in half an hour.
Lauren: Support group?
Lord Voldemort: Yeah. Evil Villains Not-So-Anonymous. It's really helping with my Harry Potter fixation and my problems recognizing that I'm dead.
Salem: Action!
Lauren: I wasn't ready!
Pinky: Take 5! I like juice. Brain? Do you like juice?
Yes, it was that kind of day. Goodnight world! I won't be taking over you tonight.
Lauren.
See that. Nothing.
The benefits of a thought-free day are numerous. In fact, nine out of ten mental health professionals agree that a thought-free day is beneficial to the improvement of mood, energy levels, overall productivity and of course, general happiness. The improvement to happiness is so significant that it has its own category outside of mood. In addition, thought-free days are shown to decrease stress by nearly 80% if performed following a list of highly specialized doctor's instructions.
If the health benefits weren't enough, the positive effect stress-free days have on free time is astounding. With the reduction of stress and increased mood and energy levels, accomplishing any pleasure oriented task becomes a breeze.
But wait! If you order now, I'll personally ship you my Guide to Thought-Free Living. It's a best seller in my mind which is the most important part of the thought-free process. In fact, I wrote it while not thinking!
If you'd like to experience this wonderful state of being, read this post over again, and again, and again because I am not saying a damn thing. Just sit back, relax and let your mind go blank with Lauren Daily. It could be your experiment.
Salem: CUT!
Lauren: What? What was wrong with that one?
Lord Voldemort: Is this really necessary? Have we really run that low on funds?
Brain: Yes.
Salem: I told you not to swear. You swore on your line about not thinking.
Lauren: You're going to have to be more specific. That whole thing was about not thinking.
Salem: Just take it from the top.
Pinky: There is no top! That's the beauty of Smelly Cat! NARF!
Salem: I bathed this morning thank you! My leg is still sore from stretching that far!
Lauren rolling her eyes: It's a Friends reference...
Lord Voldemort: Can we get back to this? I have a support group meeting in half an hour.
Lauren: Support group?
Lord Voldemort: Yeah. Evil Villains Not-So-Anonymous. It's really helping with my Harry Potter fixation and my problems recognizing that I'm dead.
Salem: Action!
Lauren: I wasn't ready!
Pinky: Take 5! I like juice. Brain? Do you like juice?
Yes, it was that kind of day. Goodnight world! I won't be taking over you tonight.
Lauren.
Saturday, April 28, 2012
The Hunger Games Trilogy Review
Okay. I have done it. I have finished the Hunger Games Trilogy. Prepare to be reviewed! Yes, it did in fact take me longer to finish than anticipated... weirdly I got inspired the other day and went on a writing tear. Felt kind of nice. No one cares. Getting to the point.
Alright, so, book two AKA Catching Fire and not Mockingjay felt a lot like the second Pirates of the Caribbean movie. It picked up where The Hunger Games left off, there was some seriously action driven plot and then BANG! it ends but clearly, things are only just beginning. To me, it wasn't as compelling as the first instalment of the series. However, what happens is crucial to the overall plot. And that's not to say that I didn't enjoy it, I did, I just didn't really connect with the characters in the same way. There weren't any really poignant dramatic moments. For the most part I found it very... what's the word... consistently suspenseful/tense? I know, not one word, but that's what I'm going with. You know there's more going on that Katniss doesn't realize and you're happy for the fast pace of the novel because you're racing along with her to figure out what it is. If you had a story and cut out the beginning and the end, you'd have this book. It's the build-up that ends in the climax for the trilogy.
Having said that, the Mockingjay is pretty fast-paced, even more so than the other novels in this series. Particularly at the end. I was confused for a while wondering what the hell happened, which I think was the point, but the wrap up happens almost too quickly. It's also much more... depressing in terms of Collins' view on human nature. In essence I suppose she's right, but a lot of this novel is just filled with horrific ironies. Without giving anything away (which is kind of difficult) I thought it was all very sad. As with The Hunger Games, I think this novel makes pretty powerful statements about our world, resiliency, determination, morality, heroism, innocence, corruption, history, ambiguity, degeneration and the cost of it all. Which is a whole lot to cover in just over 300 pages. I particularly enjoyed the way Collins' contrasts Peeta and Katniss. It's fascinating to see how they lose themselves but ultimately managed to find themselves again. The Mockingjay was definitely more... I don't want to say more violent, but you can see the characters participating in the violence more actively and more freely than in the previous books. Still, I think Collins' really handles it well by bringing up the moral ambiguities of war quite frequently.
Also without giving too much away, I was very pleased with how the whole love triangle worked out. I like how Katniss' choice is explained and I like that it was a choice. I think a lot of books for teen girls have been indicating that the chemistry and the attraction between two people are all that really matter. The heroines don't necessarily choose the healthiest option, they often choose the option that is most exciting in that particular moment or situation. That's not love and that's certainly not the foundation of a solid, real, happy, healthy relationship. I like that Katniss' choice happens on a physical, emotional and psychological level. She also happens to choose the person I was rooting for. So... not biased at all. But I was rooting for him for all the reasons listen above.
I'm not going to lie. Got a little misty during a scene with Buttercup (the cat). You'll have to read it, but it was tragic. Just felt like adding that for book 3 since I made a point of saying that there were no such moments in book 2.
An aside for my personal point of interest: dealing with soldiers prior to, during and post war. Brilliantly done.
Final Verdict: Must Read. It's really an excellent series. It's full of thought provoking, relevant, modern concerns. It's full of all kinds of emotions. Best of all, it's well written and even the most complex, difficult situations are written with a deft, sensitive hand. In a time when many people seem to seek instant gratification and easy solutions, I think this book perfectly underscores that there are no easy solutions, there is no instant way to make things better, but in the end, after someone stands up, after the mess, lie untold possibilities for happiness.
Thoroughly enjoyed it. Excellent exam reading. Pass it on!
Lauren.
Alright, so, book two AKA Catching Fire and not Mockingjay felt a lot like the second Pirates of the Caribbean movie. It picked up where The Hunger Games left off, there was some seriously action driven plot and then BANG! it ends but clearly, things are only just beginning. To me, it wasn't as compelling as the first instalment of the series. However, what happens is crucial to the overall plot. And that's not to say that I didn't enjoy it, I did, I just didn't really connect with the characters in the same way. There weren't any really poignant dramatic moments. For the most part I found it very... what's the word... consistently suspenseful/tense? I know, not one word, but that's what I'm going with. You know there's more going on that Katniss doesn't realize and you're happy for the fast pace of the novel because you're racing along with her to figure out what it is. If you had a story and cut out the beginning and the end, you'd have this book. It's the build-up that ends in the climax for the trilogy.
Having said that, the Mockingjay is pretty fast-paced, even more so than the other novels in this series. Particularly at the end. I was confused for a while wondering what the hell happened, which I think was the point, but the wrap up happens almost too quickly. It's also much more... depressing in terms of Collins' view on human nature. In essence I suppose she's right, but a lot of this novel is just filled with horrific ironies. Without giving anything away (which is kind of difficult) I thought it was all very sad. As with The Hunger Games, I think this novel makes pretty powerful statements about our world, resiliency, determination, morality, heroism, innocence, corruption, history, ambiguity, degeneration and the cost of it all. Which is a whole lot to cover in just over 300 pages. I particularly enjoyed the way Collins' contrasts Peeta and Katniss. It's fascinating to see how they lose themselves but ultimately managed to find themselves again. The Mockingjay was definitely more... I don't want to say more violent, but you can see the characters participating in the violence more actively and more freely than in the previous books. Still, I think Collins' really handles it well by bringing up the moral ambiguities of war quite frequently.
Also without giving too much away, I was very pleased with how the whole love triangle worked out. I like how Katniss' choice is explained and I like that it was a choice. I think a lot of books for teen girls have been indicating that the chemistry and the attraction between two people are all that really matter. The heroines don't necessarily choose the healthiest option, they often choose the option that is most exciting in that particular moment or situation. That's not love and that's certainly not the foundation of a solid, real, happy, healthy relationship. I like that Katniss' choice happens on a physical, emotional and psychological level. She also happens to choose the person I was rooting for. So... not biased at all. But I was rooting for him for all the reasons listen above.
I'm not going to lie. Got a little misty during a scene with Buttercup (the cat). You'll have to read it, but it was tragic. Just felt like adding that for book 3 since I made a point of saying that there were no such moments in book 2.
An aside for my personal point of interest: dealing with soldiers prior to, during and post war. Brilliantly done.
Final Verdict: Must Read. It's really an excellent series. It's full of thought provoking, relevant, modern concerns. It's full of all kinds of emotions. Best of all, it's well written and even the most complex, difficult situations are written with a deft, sensitive hand. In a time when many people seem to seek instant gratification and easy solutions, I think this book perfectly underscores that there are no easy solutions, there is no instant way to make things better, but in the end, after someone stands up, after the mess, lie untold possibilities for happiness.
Thoroughly enjoyed it. Excellent exam reading. Pass it on!
Lauren.
Friday, April 27, 2012
Not a Dirty Post (You were warned)
Whatever chemical they use to put down new flooring smells really strong.
Every year around this time, usually while my sister and I have to study for exams, my parents uncover something they would like to loudly renovate. One year it was the siding and the foundation. The year before that it was the fence. So on and so forth. Try studying. It's fun. My father also usually has a case of chest pains that lands him in the hospital. But that's a different story. This year, the aforementioned parents decided to replace the flooring in the laundry room and rec room.
As a result there's furniture absolutely everywhere. I can't find anything. There were strange men in my house. Normally that makes me uncomfortable, but I happened to overhear one of the guy's phone calls and I'm pretty sure I can take any guy how has "Moves Like Jagger" as his ringtone. Either way, they never saw me and I only glimpsed them. And the fumes wafting from the basement. Yes, I hid in my room all day with Meeko. I read and wrote while he happily snored on my computer chair.
Now whenever I go downstairs, it feels like I've entered the forest. The walls are painted a kind of minty green while the new carpet is brown and squishy like the forest floor. Not so much like poo. I know you were thinking it! Our old carpet was not squishy. In fact, it felt like we were walking on concrete. Which in fact, we were. The difference in thickness was pretty surprising. About as surprising as finding a lesbian's blog only to discover she's talking about actual carpet. I know you're disappointed, but I'm just too modest. Besides, I don't really understand that particular term anyway... it's pretty inaccurate and the association to my people is purely stereotypical. I'd like for you to now add shame for assuming such things to your initial feelings of surprise.
Aside from all that, I enjoyed my quiet day. I'm going to have a busy week so I'm really making sure to take advantage of my lack of responsibilities. As of Monday I start a summer class. Yes, even after all my bitching about school this year, I decided to take an undergraduate history class. It's about pop culture from 1914 to 1945. I like the professor and frankly, I haven't had many opportunities to really get involved with history this year. It will be nice to get back into questioning and discussing and reading. The thing about BEd is that most things are just so... obvious. I look forward to ambiguity. Also next week, I get to go to a conference out of town with some professors. I get to travel out of town and be away from here all at the same time! Woot!
I wonder how many people looking for porn will find this post and be disappointed... Should be interesting.
Lauren.
Every year around this time, usually while my sister and I have to study for exams, my parents uncover something they would like to loudly renovate. One year it was the siding and the foundation. The year before that it was the fence. So on and so forth. Try studying. It's fun. My father also usually has a case of chest pains that lands him in the hospital. But that's a different story. This year, the aforementioned parents decided to replace the flooring in the laundry room and rec room.
As a result there's furniture absolutely everywhere. I can't find anything. There were strange men in my house. Normally that makes me uncomfortable, but I happened to overhear one of the guy's phone calls and I'm pretty sure I can take any guy how has "Moves Like Jagger" as his ringtone. Either way, they never saw me and I only glimpsed them. And the fumes wafting from the basement. Yes, I hid in my room all day with Meeko. I read and wrote while he happily snored on my computer chair.
Now whenever I go downstairs, it feels like I've entered the forest. The walls are painted a kind of minty green while the new carpet is brown and squishy like the forest floor. Not so much like poo. I know you were thinking it! Our old carpet was not squishy. In fact, it felt like we were walking on concrete. Which in fact, we were. The difference in thickness was pretty surprising. About as surprising as finding a lesbian's blog only to discover she's talking about actual carpet. I know you're disappointed, but I'm just too modest. Besides, I don't really understand that particular term anyway... it's pretty inaccurate and the association to my people is purely stereotypical. I'd like for you to now add shame for assuming such things to your initial feelings of surprise.
Aside from all that, I enjoyed my quiet day. I'm going to have a busy week so I'm really making sure to take advantage of my lack of responsibilities. As of Monday I start a summer class. Yes, even after all my bitching about school this year, I decided to take an undergraduate history class. It's about pop culture from 1914 to 1945. I like the professor and frankly, I haven't had many opportunities to really get involved with history this year. It will be nice to get back into questioning and discussing and reading. The thing about BEd is that most things are just so... obvious. I look forward to ambiguity. Also next week, I get to go to a conference out of town with some professors. I get to travel out of town and be away from here all at the same time! Woot!
I wonder how many people looking for porn will find this post and be disappointed... Should be interesting.
Lauren.
Thursday, April 26, 2012
Things I Learned Today
I learned a lot today. I learned some good things and I learned some bad things. Let's begin with the bad to end on a positive note.
- Parents do not like it when their children set boundaries.
- Parents really do not like it when their children call their bluff.
- Parents hate it when their children cut them out of a part of their life.
Lately I've been having problems with my parents. I think it's an old problem that's been recycled into a new form. I'm usually pretty quiet when it comes to arguments. I don't like conflict so I take the road of least resistence. I compromise a lot. Thing is, I've spent the last year doing a lot of things that are outside my comfort zone. I've grown leaps and bounds in terms of self-confidence and confidence in my ability.Yesterday, the issue reared its ugly head and I suppose I reached my breaking point. I didn't say anything then because I know enough to step back and calm down. Tonight was a different story.
I told my parents that certain topics were no longer to be discussed unless I ask for their opinions. That didn't go over well. Not that I really expected it to. Usually I would back down or compromise after hearing the counter argument. I didn't. I reiterated that certain topics pertaining to my life are no longer up for discussion. That really, really, did not go over well. A subtle threat was made... something of an ultimatum and I did not respond the way I usually would. I accepted it and asked if it was a serious ultimatum because I would need time to get some things in order. That really, really, really didn't go over well. My parents haven't spoken to me since then. In fact, as soon as we got home (because I did this in the car after picking one of my parents up from work) they left again simply saying "I don't know" when I asked them where they were going or if they'd be back for supper.
I don't regret doing it. I think it had to be done and I didn't do it in a malicious way. I was calm but firm (my first AT should be pleased to know I've finally discovered how to be firm). Thing is, it still sucks. It sucks because I don't like that they're upset with me, I don't like that they're ignoring me, I don't like that they won't, can't or don't understand my point of view, but mostly I hate that this could all be resolved if they'd sit down and really listen to me, really look at who I am and what I need.
Well, that was uplifting. If you made it through that, I congratulate you and apologize. I needed to vent. Obviously. In terms of good things I discovered, they are more self explanatory.
- Nutella is an awesome flavour for a cheese cake.
- Summer time is the best time to be a teacher.
- I'm braver than I thought I was. (Related to the above, but also to driving. Eat that Roundabout!)
So, that was my day. Little good, little less good, little crappy. In the end though, I think I moved forward. If not, at least I know what's coming next right?
Lauren.
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
An End and Whitney on Glee
All exams complete. BEd complete. Lauren completely tired.
Wrote my final exam. It was not what I was expecting but I wasn't the only one surprised. I think everyone was. Either way, I refuse to worry about it. I can't change anything now even if I wanted to.
I celebrated my new freedom with a few friends. We went out for sushi and took full advantage of the words "all you can eat". Following that we shopped for a bit and got ice cream. YAY!
Alright, so I promised you a post about last night's episode of Glee.
I liked the music. I knew the songs were Whitney Houston but I never realized how much Whitney I actually listen to. She had a lot of really iconic, stunning songs. My favourite was the opening number with Rachel, Mercedes, Santana and Kurt. How Will I Know... brilliant.
Other than that, YAY! Minimal Finchel. I find them sickeningly sweet lately and Finn just always bugs me. So there's never a good moment. I thought the Kurt/Blaine thing was interesting. They kind of dropped out of the storyline for a while. And they really are like an old married couple. But! Seeing Blaine's conservative wardrobe makes me feel a little less Amish about mine. Extra YAY! In both cases however, I think their songs qualified as "awkward turtle" moments. I loved how uncomfortable everyone looked. Made me giggle.
And Quinn! I was actually really bothered that she was applying her makeup at the hand dryer. That's so awful! I'm not so much thinking of the fictional Quinn Fabray as real students that I've met. I can't imagine feeling insecure about my appearance to begin with and not even be able to see what I look like because I'm now too short for a mirror. When I think back to high school and I do not remember the washrooms being accessible. And my high school was undergoing some pretty serious renovations while I was there. You'd think that if you're already feeling different, something as simple as going to the washroom like all the other girls/guys would be a small comfort.
Now that I'm on the topic of Quinn, who would have thought that an erection could be a plot point outside of porn? I don't really know what to say about that. I kind of want to laugh but I also kind of want to say: "Why not?" I suppose it would be flattering if you previously thought you were too physically disgusting to be loved. Which is absolutely ridiculous... The writers of Glee really crap on Quinn an awful lot. I actually think I started liking her character out of pity. Of all the characters, she has the most right to be nuts. She changed her physical appearance to feel more comfortable with herself. She becomes emotionally damaged and thus, uncomfortable with herself. And then she is again forced into a situation in which she's uncomfortable with her physical appearance. The girl can't win. Pick on someone else Glee writers! I want to say that I'm cutting you off but I have no power.
All in all, an okay episode. I still want to know what's happening with Mike. He had a storyline for the first few episodes but there's been nothing since then. Same with Karofsky. The guy tried to kill himself. Where is he? I see the Irish kid also disappeared and was it just me or was Sugar the self-diagnosed Asperger's case absent as well? Along with Shelby, Beth and Rachel's dads. POOF! I declare them no more!
So... yeah. Sorry if this isn't up to par. I had a really crappy end of day incident. Kind of a slap in the face really. I'm off to read and get a good night's sleep. Tomorrow I am completely free for the first time since August. Wootness!
Lauren.
Wrote my final exam. It was not what I was expecting but I wasn't the only one surprised. I think everyone was. Either way, I refuse to worry about it. I can't change anything now even if I wanted to.
I celebrated my new freedom with a few friends. We went out for sushi and took full advantage of the words "all you can eat". Following that we shopped for a bit and got ice cream. YAY!
Alright, so I promised you a post about last night's episode of Glee.
I liked the music. I knew the songs were Whitney Houston but I never realized how much Whitney I actually listen to. She had a lot of really iconic, stunning songs. My favourite was the opening number with Rachel, Mercedes, Santana and Kurt. How Will I Know... brilliant.
Other than that, YAY! Minimal Finchel. I find them sickeningly sweet lately and Finn just always bugs me. So there's never a good moment. I thought the Kurt/Blaine thing was interesting. They kind of dropped out of the storyline for a while. And they really are like an old married couple. But! Seeing Blaine's conservative wardrobe makes me feel a little less Amish about mine. Extra YAY! In both cases however, I think their songs qualified as "awkward turtle" moments. I loved how uncomfortable everyone looked. Made me giggle.
And Quinn! I was actually really bothered that she was applying her makeup at the hand dryer. That's so awful! I'm not so much thinking of the fictional Quinn Fabray as real students that I've met. I can't imagine feeling insecure about my appearance to begin with and not even be able to see what I look like because I'm now too short for a mirror. When I think back to high school and I do not remember the washrooms being accessible. And my high school was undergoing some pretty serious renovations while I was there. You'd think that if you're already feeling different, something as simple as going to the washroom like all the other girls/guys would be a small comfort.
 |
| Not that easy any more... And neither is finding a picture of her at the hand dryer... geez. |
Now that I'm on the topic of Quinn, who would have thought that an erection could be a plot point outside of porn? I don't really know what to say about that. I kind of want to laugh but I also kind of want to say: "Why not?" I suppose it would be flattering if you previously thought you were too physically disgusting to be loved. Which is absolutely ridiculous... The writers of Glee really crap on Quinn an awful lot. I actually think I started liking her character out of pity. Of all the characters, she has the most right to be nuts. She changed her physical appearance to feel more comfortable with herself. She becomes emotionally damaged and thus, uncomfortable with herself. And then she is again forced into a situation in which she's uncomfortable with her physical appearance. The girl can't win. Pick on someone else Glee writers! I want to say that I'm cutting you off but I have no power.
All in all, an okay episode. I still want to know what's happening with Mike. He had a storyline for the first few episodes but there's been nothing since then. Same with Karofsky. The guy tried to kill himself. Where is he? I see the Irish kid also disappeared and was it just me or was Sugar the self-diagnosed Asperger's case absent as well? Along with Shelby, Beth and Rachel's dads. POOF! I declare them no more!
So... yeah. Sorry if this isn't up to par. I had a really crappy end of day incident. Kind of a slap in the face really. I'm off to read and get a good night's sleep. Tomorrow I am completely free for the first time since August. Wootness!
Lauren.
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Spectrums and Other Stuff I Did While not Studying
Alright. Last Exam. The only thing standing between me and The Mocking Jay. Again. But we won't focus on how I was temporarily reading the books out of order. Still don't know how I didn't realize that... Anywho, studying for history, the only class I truly and consistently enjoyed throughout the year.
Our professor told us to review all the articles we'd read and go over the textbook again. Before you go thinking his demands are ridiculous, our textbook is probably about as thick as all the articles we've read put together. We only read 5 articles. Still, in typical Lauren fashion, I've procrastinated spectacularly. Did I reread everything? No. Definitely not. I struggled through those things once, I am not doing it again. I swear, if I ever meet the editor of that textbook I will introduce him/her to Mr. Dictionary and Ms. Spellcheck. Regardless of my feelings on the shoddy at best editing, I skimmed the articles and quickly realized that all four are telling me the exact same thing:
Teaching in history has two spectrums.
Spectrum 1: on one end we have teaching to create good citizens who don't upset the established order. On the other end, we have teaching to create citizens who question everything and want to rebuild society.
Spectrum 2: on one end we focus on teaching the student and following his/her interests. On the other end, we focus on teaching subject matter and how to process that subject matter regardless of what the student thinks or feels.
I assume we're suppose to be in the middle of both spectrums. I'm not in the middle. Oh darn...
I summarized everything in one and a half hand written pages. And yes, I have complete sentences. It's not all point form. Okay! There's one diagram! Sue me.
All of that aside, today's sign that it's time to quit: my feet keep falling asleep. Not at the same time. Once I regain circulation in one, the other nods off. I don't know what that means about me or the way I'm sitting but it's uncomfortable. I'm taking it as a sign that if my feet are sleepy, the rest of me can't be far behind.
Due to sleepiness and studying, I will very quickly speak of Glee, The Hunger Games and that other thing I did today.
1) Glee: I liked this episode more than the last. And who could have foreseen an erection being a plot point. Bravo. I'll speak on this more tomorrow.
2) Hunger Games: I finished reading Catching Fire. I was on the last chapter and had to keep putting it down. Very irritating. I enjoyed the read but I will refrain from reviewing it until I've finished The Mockingjay. I think they'll go better together.
3) My Exam: Went well. My handwriting is my revenge! At least I was kind enough to double space and draw a cute cat waving goodbye and thanking my prof for his tolerance of my class' clear distaste for the program. Remind me again, are paragraphs typically four pages in length? MWAHAHAHAHA!
Alas, that is all. I'm off to bathe and sleep. Not simultaneously. Although... I have been known to do that... No, I'll sleep in my bed. Decided. Three more hours of BEd!
Lauren.
Our professor told us to review all the articles we'd read and go over the textbook again. Before you go thinking his demands are ridiculous, our textbook is probably about as thick as all the articles we've read put together. We only read 5 articles. Still, in typical Lauren fashion, I've procrastinated spectacularly. Did I reread everything? No. Definitely not. I struggled through those things once, I am not doing it again. I swear, if I ever meet the editor of that textbook I will introduce him/her to Mr. Dictionary and Ms. Spellcheck. Regardless of my feelings on the shoddy at best editing, I skimmed the articles and quickly realized that all four are telling me the exact same thing:
Teaching in history has two spectrums.
Spectrum 1: on one end we have teaching to create good citizens who don't upset the established order. On the other end, we have teaching to create citizens who question everything and want to rebuild society.
Spectrum 2: on one end we focus on teaching the student and following his/her interests. On the other end, we focus on teaching subject matter and how to process that subject matter regardless of what the student thinks or feels.
I assume we're suppose to be in the middle of both spectrums. I'm not in the middle. Oh darn...
I summarized everything in one and a half hand written pages. And yes, I have complete sentences. It's not all point form. Okay! There's one diagram! Sue me.
All of that aside, today's sign that it's time to quit: my feet keep falling asleep. Not at the same time. Once I regain circulation in one, the other nods off. I don't know what that means about me or the way I'm sitting but it's uncomfortable. I'm taking it as a sign that if my feet are sleepy, the rest of me can't be far behind.
Due to sleepiness and studying, I will very quickly speak of Glee, The Hunger Games and that other thing I did today.
1) Glee: I liked this episode more than the last. And who could have foreseen an erection being a plot point. Bravo. I'll speak on this more tomorrow.
2) Hunger Games: I finished reading Catching Fire. I was on the last chapter and had to keep putting it down. Very irritating. I enjoyed the read but I will refrain from reviewing it until I've finished The Mockingjay. I think they'll go better together.
3) My Exam: Went well. My handwriting is my revenge! At least I was kind enough to double space and draw a cute cat waving goodbye and thanking my prof for his tolerance of my class' clear distaste for the program. Remind me again, are paragraphs typically four pages in length? MWAHAHAHAHA!
Alas, that is all. I'm off to bathe and sleep. Not simultaneously. Although... I have been known to do that... No, I'll sleep in my bed. Decided. Three more hours of BEd!
Lauren.
Monday, April 23, 2012
Study Tips for the Weary
My exam went pretty well I think. I actually was a bit worried. Given that the class was about how to evaluate students in a fair and consistent manner, I didn't want to think it would be ridiculous. Then I thought some more and remembered that my prof... is an interesting man with a bit of a sadistic streak. It was up in the air. So apparently he only gets his jollies when we can complain and be stubborn and unimpressed and pissed off about whatever it is he's making us do.
Alas, I have another exam tomorrow. My exam question for today is: How do you know when you're done studying?
When you look like this. Hopefully not trying to drown yourself. That would be extreme and bad.
How do you know you've studied too long?
You look like this. Trying desperately to catch information floating about outside your mind. Or you've just been drinking to make the task of studying bearable and as a result, you're drunk and no longer feeling any pain. Screw the exam! Let's dance!
Honestly though, I just wanted to post pictures of funny looking cats. What would we do without animals in our lives? Who would make us laugh? Who would snuggle up to us and so willingly share their body heat when it's freezing cold and our parents won't turn up the damn heat because it's already 21 and that's hot enough? Who would squish our boobs with tiny paws applying tons of weight to a relatively sensitive area causing mild pain? ...Wait, what? There are people who do that? Even that last one? I dunno... Maybe I have been in my own little world too long.
Off to read Catching Fire. Hey, I look like the first cat. I don't want to get to the second.
Lauren.
Alas, I have another exam tomorrow. My exam question for today is: How do you know when you're done studying?
When you look like this. Hopefully not trying to drown yourself. That would be extreme and bad.
 |
| Hate to be the one picking that cat out of the pool... |
You look like this. Trying desperately to catch information floating about outside your mind. Or you've just been drinking to make the task of studying bearable and as a result, you're drunk and no longer feeling any pain. Screw the exam! Let's dance!
Honestly though, I just wanted to post pictures of funny looking cats. What would we do without animals in our lives? Who would make us laugh? Who would snuggle up to us and so willingly share their body heat when it's freezing cold and our parents won't turn up the damn heat because it's already 21 and that's hot enough? Who would squish our boobs with tiny paws applying tons of weight to a relatively sensitive area causing mild pain? ...Wait, what? There are people who do that? Even that last one? I dunno... Maybe I have been in my own little world too long.
Off to read Catching Fire. Hey, I look like the first cat. I don't want to get to the second.
Lauren.
Sunday, April 22, 2012
Preparation Indifference
How do I feel about exams? Behold! One thousand words!
I love that movie. Kind of makes me want a dragon. Alas, the only dragons I know are still tragically in human form. Because everyone knows that dragons hide in plain sight. As do unicorns if you watch Glee. Their horns are retractable. Duh.
So I studied today. I opened my books, made some notes, read over stuff, remembered stuff. And got bored. But then I remembered that my exam is tomorrow. So I reopened my books, continued my notes, read a little. And got bored. As always, I procrastinated. This time, I played a game that involves racing cats through a house. Catnip gives you boosts of speed but there are also weapons to be weary of. I'm talking serious shit here. Laser pointers, balls of yarn, dog holograms and firecrackers that make a lot of noise and scare the crap (not literally) out of your cat. The first two are mere distractors but still effective. But naturally, I returned to my studies! After winning four races and testing out my new cat on all the courses.
Basically, every time I would start reading over my stuff, I would realize that I knew it. And I do. However, I'm painfully aware that when I sit at my wobbly desk tomorrow and meticulously organize my pencils and straighten everything to 90 degree angles and finally get the okay to turn the damn exam over, that I'm going to be stumped by some questions. What? You don't have an exam ritual where you straighten everything and lay everything out so that it's just so? Weird...
I'm not nervous exactly. I've written dozens of exams by now. I know how it works. It's just that... I'm so over this year that I'm a bit worried about whether my attitude is more indifferent than prepared. For me, the two can feel remarkably similar. At least, they do when I get my results back. Either way, by noon tomorrow it'll be over and it won't matter anymore.
So, again:
What more needs to be said?
Lauren.
I love that movie. Kind of makes me want a dragon. Alas, the only dragons I know are still tragically in human form. Because everyone knows that dragons hide in plain sight. As do unicorns if you watch Glee. Their horns are retractable. Duh.
So I studied today. I opened my books, made some notes, read over stuff, remembered stuff. And got bored. But then I remembered that my exam is tomorrow. So I reopened my books, continued my notes, read a little. And got bored. As always, I procrastinated. This time, I played a game that involves racing cats through a house. Catnip gives you boosts of speed but there are also weapons to be weary of. I'm talking serious shit here. Laser pointers, balls of yarn, dog holograms and firecrackers that make a lot of noise and scare the crap (not literally) out of your cat. The first two are mere distractors but still effective. But naturally, I returned to my studies! After winning four races and testing out my new cat on all the courses.
Basically, every time I would start reading over my stuff, I would realize that I knew it. And I do. However, I'm painfully aware that when I sit at my wobbly desk tomorrow and meticulously organize my pencils and straighten everything to 90 degree angles and finally get the okay to turn the damn exam over, that I'm going to be stumped by some questions. What? You don't have an exam ritual where you straighten everything and lay everything out so that it's just so? Weird...
I'm not nervous exactly. I've written dozens of exams by now. I know how it works. It's just that... I'm so over this year that I'm a bit worried about whether my attitude is more indifferent than prepared. For me, the two can feel remarkably similar. At least, they do when I get my results back. Either way, by noon tomorrow it'll be over and it won't matter anymore.
So, again:
What more needs to be said?
Lauren.
If I Could Lie
I have a pretty wicked bruise on my forehead from literally and accidentally head-deasking. Yes, head-desk is now a verb. After the pain of hitting my face subsided, I felt the emotional pain that comes with embarrassment. I'm pretty good at managing that one. I felt like I'd fallen into/out of (I'm not sure which, depends on the day) a Three Stooges show. Slapstick humour at its finest. So, for all the doubters out there, some people (me) do bend over to pick things up and smash their heads into things on their way down.
The upside is that my eyebrow is hiding the majority of the bruise. Which is a good thing primarily because I don't want to have to admit to how I got the bruise in the first place. Yes, I realize lying is an option, but I'm just so bad at it there's not much of a point. For example, top three excuses off the top of my head (ha, pun)
1) Hobo knife fight
2) Meeko tried to kill me because I didn't turn the water on
3) Won a door prize. The guy was drunk and not paying attention.
For any of these be believable I would have to:
a) Leave my house.
b) Have a spiteful cat and Meeko's not spiteful. Sure he holds a grudge for a bit too long, but he's a softy and will give in for belly-rubs.
See, told you I'm a bad liar. I'll say I have a concussion and it's affecting my ability to think clearly.
Incidentally, I have had a concussion before. Want to know how it happened? I was playing around with a soccer ball in my backyard after travelling for eight and a half hours in a car. I didn't know it had rained for a significant portion of the day at home. My shoes had no tread. I slipped in the grass, tripped over the deck and bashed my head into the chimney. I don't remember tripping, falling or getting up. All I remember is that when I could see again, I was kneeling, holding my head and swearing. So, I guess I'd also like to know what happened even though I'm pretty sure my assumption is correct. Due to a temper tantrum earlier in the day, my parents thought I did it on purpose. And I was the one who was concussed... really. This is also a story I would like to lie about. If you were wondering why I felt the need to retell it.
Aside from marvelling at my own clumsiness and stupidity, I procrastinated. I'm almost halfway through Catching Fire, the second book in The Hunger Games series. I was finally informed that I was reading the books out of order. Yet another ditz move on my part. I really don't know how I didn't realize sooner. Luckily, I didn't get very far, but still... Even though the timeline wouldn't allow for it, I'm going to claim concussion again.
Isn't having an imagination great!
Lauren.
The upside is that my eyebrow is hiding the majority of the bruise. Which is a good thing primarily because I don't want to have to admit to how I got the bruise in the first place. Yes, I realize lying is an option, but I'm just so bad at it there's not much of a point. For example, top three excuses off the top of my head (ha, pun)
1) Hobo knife fight
2) Meeko tried to kill me because I didn't turn the water on
3) Won a door prize. The guy was drunk and not paying attention.
For any of these be believable I would have to:
a) Leave my house.
b) Have a spiteful cat and Meeko's not spiteful. Sure he holds a grudge for a bit too long, but he's a softy and will give in for belly-rubs.
See, told you I'm a bad liar. I'll say I have a concussion and it's affecting my ability to think clearly.
Incidentally, I have had a concussion before. Want to know how it happened? I was playing around with a soccer ball in my backyard after travelling for eight and a half hours in a car. I didn't know it had rained for a significant portion of the day at home. My shoes had no tread. I slipped in the grass, tripped over the deck and bashed my head into the chimney. I don't remember tripping, falling or getting up. All I remember is that when I could see again, I was kneeling, holding my head and swearing. So, I guess I'd also like to know what happened even though I'm pretty sure my assumption is correct. Due to a temper tantrum earlier in the day, my parents thought I did it on purpose. And I was the one who was concussed... really. This is also a story I would like to lie about. If you were wondering why I felt the need to retell it.
Aside from marvelling at my own clumsiness and stupidity, I procrastinated. I'm almost halfway through Catching Fire, the second book in The Hunger Games series. I was finally informed that I was reading the books out of order. Yet another ditz move on my part. I really don't know how I didn't realize sooner. Luckily, I didn't get very far, but still... Even though the timeline wouldn't allow for it, I'm going to claim concussion again.
Isn't having an imagination great!
Lauren.
Saturday, April 21, 2012
Perceptions and Head Banging
Last day.
The weather was atrocious. Like wet, slushy, hailish snow kind of atrocious. Thankfully, my sister offered me a ride. Aside from being happy that this year is over, a few things happened that bothered me. They aren't big things at all, but they kind of speak to larger issues that I've always had.
The past week I've been much happier, much sillier, much more the person I enjoy being. And people have noticed. I've gotten comments every day this week about how I'm in a good mood and how it's nice to see me in a good mood. That kind of hurts. I know where it's coming from and I know people don't mean for it to hurt my feelings or whatever, but it does. It makes me think that I've been coming across as some horrible black cloud of a person. Which is entirely possible. But it's not who I am, that's my depression. I'm actually a strangely optimistic, oddly cheerful person. If I didn't have dysthymia, I'd likely be a stereotypical, albeit sleepy, cheerleader-type.
When I first started taking meds and going to therapy regularly, my friends all noticed a change in my behaviour. I'd changed for the better and they would tell me that I seemed happier, more comfortable, more me. That felt good. It's improvement. I did well for years. And then this year, I had what I suppose could be called a depressive relapse? I didn't want to be that person again. And I tried really hard not to be. Ugh... stupid brain and body chemistry getting in my way again. Maybe it's a good thing I isolated myself after all. I don't want people knowing that Lauren. That's not who I am. That's a product of stress, anxiety and outside factors that I don't control. With things happening one after another this year, it was very difficult to manage myself.
The other issue that bothered me, I don't like to talk about. I rarely talk about it and if it comes up in conversation, I usually block or find a way to fade out until a new topic arises. In spite of being awkward I can be quite conversationally savvy. It's a kind of savvy... let me have this one. Again, it's an issue of perception except that this time, I don't know why people perceive me the way they do. I don't think I've given them a reason to see me that way. Yet they do. I think what hurts most is their surprise when I contradict their view of me. Like it never entered their mind that I may have that need or desire. And then I get to wondering what it is that I project that makes people think what they do. When I ask why people are surprised, I usually get awkward babbling or non-answers. Perhaps they don't have a reason for thinking what they do. I don't know. People are weird.
Oh! I forgot, one other thing really hurt me today. I dropped something on the floor, I don't remember what. Anyway, it fell under my desk. When I bent down to pick it up, I smashed my face into my desktop. I don't know how I didn't see that coming. I'm going to have some crazy looking bruise over my left eyebrow and I'm going to have to explain how it got there... great. See, this is why I quit sports. It stopped being about the game and became more about my injuries. Some people just aren't meant to play sports that don't involve them being in plastic, padded bubbles. I'd probably have to wear some kind of padded suit as well... yes, in spite of being in a bubble. I accept my clumsiness and envy those who can move gracefully and without to threat of causing injury to themselves or others.
It's all about being yourself.
Lauren.
The weather was atrocious. Like wet, slushy, hailish snow kind of atrocious. Thankfully, my sister offered me a ride. Aside from being happy that this year is over, a few things happened that bothered me. They aren't big things at all, but they kind of speak to larger issues that I've always had.
The past week I've been much happier, much sillier, much more the person I enjoy being. And people have noticed. I've gotten comments every day this week about how I'm in a good mood and how it's nice to see me in a good mood. That kind of hurts. I know where it's coming from and I know people don't mean for it to hurt my feelings or whatever, but it does. It makes me think that I've been coming across as some horrible black cloud of a person. Which is entirely possible. But it's not who I am, that's my depression. I'm actually a strangely optimistic, oddly cheerful person. If I didn't have dysthymia, I'd likely be a stereotypical, albeit sleepy, cheerleader-type.
When I first started taking meds and going to therapy regularly, my friends all noticed a change in my behaviour. I'd changed for the better and they would tell me that I seemed happier, more comfortable, more me. That felt good. It's improvement. I did well for years. And then this year, I had what I suppose could be called a depressive relapse? I didn't want to be that person again. And I tried really hard not to be. Ugh... stupid brain and body chemistry getting in my way again. Maybe it's a good thing I isolated myself after all. I don't want people knowing that Lauren. That's not who I am. That's a product of stress, anxiety and outside factors that I don't control. With things happening one after another this year, it was very difficult to manage myself.
The other issue that bothered me, I don't like to talk about. I rarely talk about it and if it comes up in conversation, I usually block or find a way to fade out until a new topic arises. In spite of being awkward I can be quite conversationally savvy. It's a kind of savvy... let me have this one. Again, it's an issue of perception except that this time, I don't know why people perceive me the way they do. I don't think I've given them a reason to see me that way. Yet they do. I think what hurts most is their surprise when I contradict their view of me. Like it never entered their mind that I may have that need or desire. And then I get to wondering what it is that I project that makes people think what they do. When I ask why people are surprised, I usually get awkward babbling or non-answers. Perhaps they don't have a reason for thinking what they do. I don't know. People are weird.
Oh! I forgot, one other thing really hurt me today. I dropped something on the floor, I don't remember what. Anyway, it fell under my desk. When I bent down to pick it up, I smashed my face into my desktop. I don't know how I didn't see that coming. I'm going to have some crazy looking bruise over my left eyebrow and I'm going to have to explain how it got there... great. See, this is why I quit sports. It stopped being about the game and became more about my injuries. Some people just aren't meant to play sports that don't involve them being in plastic, padded bubbles. I'd probably have to wear some kind of padded suit as well... yes, in spite of being in a bubble. I accept my clumsiness and envy those who can move gracefully and without to threat of causing injury to themselves or others.
It's all about being yourself.
Lauren.
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Nostalgia? Really?
Only two classes remain. By 12:30 tomorrow, I'll have finished my BEd. Well, not technically, I still have exams next week, but the class part will be done. A very weird thing happened today. Apart from feeling more like myself than I have in a really long time, I realized that I'm actually going to miss my section-mates. We're an awful class, our profs hate us, but that's what I like about us. We're random and snarky and frustrated and so inappropriate. Inappropriate should be entirely capitalized. If we had to teach our class, we probably would have killed us by now. So, some credit must be given to our profs.
We took a group picture today and I found myself getting oddly nostalgic. For what I'm unsure. I kept to myself way more than I should have, but I do have good memories. The one standing out at the moment is of Movember. Guys grow horrible moustaches to fundraise for cancer. One guy in my section grew a disgusting moustache, I don't even think the style he'd... shaped... it into has a name. Either way, I ran into him in the hall and he started talking to me. He's already about half a foot taller than me so I'm talking into his chest, but generally I make an effort to look people in the eyes when I speak to them. I could not look beyond his friggin' moustache. I tried. I made a conscious effort, but it was so bad... I had to stare. Like a care accident. It's horrible and you want to look away, but something inside you won't let you. And I will never forget playing Headbands and having a swastika on my forehead for ten minutes while the class looked on in confusion. Or the time I went to the washroom a floor up from my class. I wound up finishing my business at the same time as one of my professors. She promptly asked me if I was stalking her. Really, I just wanted to pee and the bathroom on the floor below has an unclean smell that makes me gag whenever I set foot inside it. I didn't tell her that, but I did deny stalking her. I had a similar experience in the same washroom with a different prof. This time, she merely accused me of being on the same schedule as she was. I still don't know whether or not I should be disturbed. Why does weird stuff happen to me in bathrooms? Seriously, I just want to go in, do my thing, wash my hands and get out. Is this what guys feel like when there are open urinals but some dude stands right next to them?
No matter how bad an experience is, no matter how difficult, there are always good moments to look back on fondly. There's always something that happens to surprise you or make you smile. Already I'm starting to forget how stupid half the stuff I did was. I said I was starting, not that I had. In the end though, I did laugh a lot. And in spite of my fantastically crappy attitude, I learned a lot as well. So, definitely not time wasted.
Even more strange, if I had children, I think I would actually trust my section mates with their education. I did not see that coming.
Lauren.
We took a group picture today and I found myself getting oddly nostalgic. For what I'm unsure. I kept to myself way more than I should have, but I do have good memories. The one standing out at the moment is of Movember. Guys grow horrible moustaches to fundraise for cancer. One guy in my section grew a disgusting moustache, I don't even think the style he'd... shaped... it into has a name. Either way, I ran into him in the hall and he started talking to me. He's already about half a foot taller than me so I'm talking into his chest, but generally I make an effort to look people in the eyes when I speak to them. I could not look beyond his friggin' moustache. I tried. I made a conscious effort, but it was so bad... I had to stare. Like a care accident. It's horrible and you want to look away, but something inside you won't let you. And I will never forget playing Headbands and having a swastika on my forehead for ten minutes while the class looked on in confusion. Or the time I went to the washroom a floor up from my class. I wound up finishing my business at the same time as one of my professors. She promptly asked me if I was stalking her. Really, I just wanted to pee and the bathroom on the floor below has an unclean smell that makes me gag whenever I set foot inside it. I didn't tell her that, but I did deny stalking her. I had a similar experience in the same washroom with a different prof. This time, she merely accused me of being on the same schedule as she was. I still don't know whether or not I should be disturbed. Why does weird stuff happen to me in bathrooms? Seriously, I just want to go in, do my thing, wash my hands and get out. Is this what guys feel like when there are open urinals but some dude stands right next to them?
No matter how bad an experience is, no matter how difficult, there are always good moments to look back on fondly. There's always something that happens to surprise you or make you smile. Already I'm starting to forget how stupid half the stuff I did was. I said I was starting, not that I had. In the end though, I did laugh a lot. And in spite of my fantastically crappy attitude, I learned a lot as well. So, definitely not time wasted.
Even more strange, if I had children, I think I would actually trust my section mates with their education. I did not see that coming.
Lauren.
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Like Wine
I had my last history class today. This one I am going to miss. My professor was excellent. I will classify him as one of the better teachers I've had. Ever. And that's not an easy category to get into. I've had professors and I've had teachers, but the ones that make it into my Best Teacher category have actually taught me something significant, beyond the subject matter. Not only did he teach me how to teach history, he taught me how to make something I love engaging, fun, exciting and creative. That's not to say I wouldn't have figured it out while in the field, but getting to practice those skills with my peers, getting to test things out and laugh and just talk was fantastic. Not to mention that I like him as a person as well. I can usually separate the two, but all the teachers I've loved have been people I've liked. I can respect the job, but it's even better if I can respect the person doing it.
Other than that, frankly, I have no idea where the day went.
I got some good news that I'll discuss in greater detail when I'm more awake. I'm slowly forming a plan for my future. I got a call about two great job opportunities for the summer. The book I ordered on Amazon.ca two days ago got here. God Amazon is amazing. I even got some writing done! All in all, things are looking up. I don't like the "light at the end of the tunnel" expression because I always think of "heading into the light" as in dying. And then that makes me think of Alanis Morissette's song "Ironic" in which a man gets on a plane for the first time and it crashes. That would be my luck. But like I said, today was good!
As BEd is wrapping up, I'm feeling more and more like myself again. I've missed me. Not that I've been a totally different person over the last year, but maybe just... more reserved, more pessimistic, more stressed, more withdrawn. Typical depressive/anxious symptoms. Like certain wines, this year was not my best. I learned a lot, I'm glad I stuck it out. I know I'll use everything I learned at some point in my life, but I have a sense that I'll be using it on my own terms, in a manner that differs from how many of my peers will use it. It still remains to be seen. Education is never wasted. It just feels like the money we spend on it is.
Lauren.
Other than that, frankly, I have no idea where the day went.
I got some good news that I'll discuss in greater detail when I'm more awake. I'm slowly forming a plan for my future. I got a call about two great job opportunities for the summer. The book I ordered on Amazon.ca two days ago got here. God Amazon is amazing. I even got some writing done! All in all, things are looking up. I don't like the "light at the end of the tunnel" expression because I always think of "heading into the light" as in dying. And then that makes me think of Alanis Morissette's song "Ironic" in which a man gets on a plane for the first time and it crashes. That would be my luck. But like I said, today was good!
As BEd is wrapping up, I'm feeling more and more like myself again. I've missed me. Not that I've been a totally different person over the last year, but maybe just... more reserved, more pessimistic, more stressed, more withdrawn. Typical depressive/anxious symptoms. Like certain wines, this year was not my best. I learned a lot, I'm glad I stuck it out. I know I'll use everything I learned at some point in my life, but I have a sense that I'll be using it on my own terms, in a manner that differs from how many of my peers will use it. It still remains to be seen. Education is never wasted. It just feels like the money we spend on it is.
Lauren.
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Glee and Careers
Wasn't really diggin' this episode of Glee. Episodes like this one make me question why I'm still watching it. The music was entertaining as always, but I was actually having to suppress my gag reflex with Rachel and Finn. The madness knows no end. I think I'm going to stop hoping... but thank God for John Travolta right? Because otherwise, Finn never would have figured out what he wanted to do with his life. Perhaps I should go rent that movie... oh wait... can't. Blockbuster is dead.
I'm going to point form the rest of my list because I don't feel like writing them out in detail. Maybe a more concise list will be more effective.
I'm going to point form the rest of my list because I don't feel like writing them out in detail. Maybe a more concise list will be more effective.
- Where was Quinn? Be sure to take two seconds (literally, don't go over time) next episode to explain that she was in physio and learned to walk again. I'll need that explanation when she's randomly standing.
- Yay for giving the marginalized characters (Finn aside) a chance at having a story. Santana's story was stupid. Though, I will say this for Santana, the girl can wear a suit. She should be in suits forevermore. I'm talking Barney Stinson suit pyjamas. If this episode was not satisfactory evidence of the previously mentioned fact, please refer back to the Michael Jackson episode. Mercedes also looked amazing in that red dress. Bravo!
- Noticeably absent marginalized character: Tina.
- Applause once again to Glee for introducing a trans character! Now what are you going to do with this storyline? It's going to be totally forgotten isn't it?
- Jessie=barf.
- Whole lot of music at a point where there should be some story developing. Particularly after last week's episode. Kind of a pointless episode with not a whole lot going on.
- It's unrealistic to make teens choose their careers when people who've been to university aren't able to decide on what they want to do, let alone find a job.
Aside from that, I find myself unwilling to criticize Finn because I've unexpectedly found myself in the same dilemma. Oh the humanity!
I however have come up with an answer to the question: What are you going to do now?
I feel like a six year old so I will answer as a six year old: I'm gonna be an octopus! That way I can do eight different things all at the same time!
And yes, I'm aware that even someone with mediocre skills could turn that into a dirty sentence. Nevertheless, I've made up my mind. I will be an octopus when I grow up.
So there adults! Nani-poo!
Lauren
Monday, April 16, 2012
Mighty Pen, Imaginary Power
The days I've been waiting for are upon me! YAY!
I know it sounds petty, but when I'm in a miserable class, I always look forward to filling out the professor evaluations. No one cares what's written on them, namely because it's a small university and we're probably lucky to have professors willing to work here, but I always feel better about voicing my discontent in an official manner and pretending that my criticism will make a difference.
Actually, in my history class, our prof gave us all a sheet (a single sheet) with defined boxes (no lines inside) to write down what we thought of the faculty and our placements, what could be changed, what could be made better, what's working... Basically, the format of the sheet indicates that whoever wrote it doesn't really give a crap about what we want changed and what we like. We're in teacher's college, we've learned how to write out forms and questions. We know what it means when you give us a single-sided sheet and tiny boxes to handwrite in. I have to admit, my petulant, inner five year old self escaped. I filled in the boxes, drew an arrow in the margin and filled up the whole back of the sheet. I may or may not have accused the faculty of enforcing discriminatory practices... twice. I'm always tempted, in a final act of defiance, to sign my name. I never do. That always seems like one step too far. Then again, I probably don't have to make that step. Not many people write like a woman escaped from the nineteenth century. But I felt so much better! God I've hated this year! Not all of it. Maybe 80%. I'm not the only one with issues either. We talked for an hour about this one-sided sheet and if we'd had more time, we would have used it. To his credit, my prof looked appropriately shocked and bothered by some of the things we were telling him. Hopefully he can translate our issues from English to bureaucrat. Perhaps his complaints will be more effective than ours.
As for my professors, I liked both of them. I think they were both really passionate about their subjects, they liked engaging us in discussion, they brought in a variety of resources, their assignments were relevant, they were funny and caring and willing to take extra time to talk to us. I had nothing bad to say about them. I will actually miss going to those classes. Hurray! Teacher's college had two effective, engaging teachers!
My other professors will not be so fortunate. MWAHAHAHAHA! You remember what I said about being a benevolent dictator right? Well that's only if you don't piss me off. And again, I will acknowledge that no one reads the evaluations so my minuscule amount of power is in fact, imaginary. But! Imaginary or no, I still have it. Then again, those profs may consider themselves fortunate. They're probably as anxious to get rid of me as I am to be rid of them. Being in a state of constant frustration apparently inhibits my ability to keep my mouth shut because I was running it pretty loudly all year. So... yeah... no secrets there. To them, I'm kind of an asshole.
Oh Staples, if you could only have commercials for this time of year. This time of year is wonderful, the most wonderful!
Lauren.
I know it sounds petty, but when I'm in a miserable class, I always look forward to filling out the professor evaluations. No one cares what's written on them, namely because it's a small university and we're probably lucky to have professors willing to work here, but I always feel better about voicing my discontent in an official manner and pretending that my criticism will make a difference.
Actually, in my history class, our prof gave us all a sheet (a single sheet) with defined boxes (no lines inside) to write down what we thought of the faculty and our placements, what could be changed, what could be made better, what's working... Basically, the format of the sheet indicates that whoever wrote it doesn't really give a crap about what we want changed and what we like. We're in teacher's college, we've learned how to write out forms and questions. We know what it means when you give us a single-sided sheet and tiny boxes to handwrite in. I have to admit, my petulant, inner five year old self escaped. I filled in the boxes, drew an arrow in the margin and filled up the whole back of the sheet. I may or may not have accused the faculty of enforcing discriminatory practices... twice. I'm always tempted, in a final act of defiance, to sign my name. I never do. That always seems like one step too far. Then again, I probably don't have to make that step. Not many people write like a woman escaped from the nineteenth century. But I felt so much better! God I've hated this year! Not all of it. Maybe 80%. I'm not the only one with issues either. We talked for an hour about this one-sided sheet and if we'd had more time, we would have used it. To his credit, my prof looked appropriately shocked and bothered by some of the things we were telling him. Hopefully he can translate our issues from English to bureaucrat. Perhaps his complaints will be more effective than ours.
As for my professors, I liked both of them. I think they were both really passionate about their subjects, they liked engaging us in discussion, they brought in a variety of resources, their assignments were relevant, they were funny and caring and willing to take extra time to talk to us. I had nothing bad to say about them. I will actually miss going to those classes. Hurray! Teacher's college had two effective, engaging teachers!
My other professors will not be so fortunate. MWAHAHAHAHA! You remember what I said about being a benevolent dictator right? Well that's only if you don't piss me off. And again, I will acknowledge that no one reads the evaluations so my minuscule amount of power is in fact, imaginary. But! Imaginary or no, I still have it. Then again, those profs may consider themselves fortunate. They're probably as anxious to get rid of me as I am to be rid of them. Being in a state of constant frustration apparently inhibits my ability to keep my mouth shut because I was running it pretty loudly all year. So... yeah... no secrets there. To them, I'm kind of an asshole.
Oh Staples, if you could only have commercials for this time of year. This time of year is wonderful, the most wonderful!
Lauren.
Sunday, April 15, 2012
Aw Bull...
My mother has come up with a new motto for me. It's in French, but it translates to "Charge". To be honest, I'm really good at charging due to the fact that I have an extremely hard head. This fact is both medically and metaphorically proven. The only problem with the whole "charge" philosophy is that I don't really know what I'm charging at. I feel like a bull trapped in a circular arena with half a dozen dudes waving red sheets at me. So many directions and so many little dudes to trample. I don't know which to attack first. All I know is that the matador representing an English MA has managed to flee the arena unscathed with next to no possibility of becoming scathed in the future.
I suppose I'm making tentative steps toward the other dudes, sizing them up before I attack the weakest one and destroy him under...hoof? Have we had enough of the bull metaphor yet? I'm choosing to ignore its principle flaw, namely that bulls are male while I am not. Meh.
So, yesterday I talked about the possibility of doing something good today. A friend and I organized a workshop to promote awareness of and sensitivity toward non-heterosexual students in classrooms. We had tons of resources, a couple of simple activities, lots of info and I think for putting it together so quickly, we were pretty damn organized. Problem? You need people to present to. The first day we got no one. It wasn't surprising, but it was slightly disappointing. There was other stuff going on at the school, the announcement for our workshop was made very last minute (stupid school) and it was scheduled on a Friday. Like I said, not surprising. Today I had higher hopes. Several people told me they'd be there, they'd try to come out (no pun intended) but I guess that didn't work out for them. We got one person.
We didn't really talk about it or question it. When the time to start came, we started. Obviously we modified the presentation, but we hit on all of our main points and still took over an hour. I'm really happy we got to do the presentation at all. And I'm really happy that at least one person got something out of it. At the same time, it's still a bit disappointing.
I charged and I hit the wall... again. I do that a lot.
I'm reminded of a line from The Princess Diaries (the first one): "Wanting to rock the world but having zip power like me, that's a nightmare." Oh Lily, how right you are.
One day I shall wake from my nightmare and be a benevolent dictator. Yes, dictator. I've waited long enough for the power to affect change. I'm not sharing it when I get it.
Lauren.
I suppose I'm making tentative steps toward the other dudes, sizing them up before I attack the weakest one and destroy him under...hoof? Have we had enough of the bull metaphor yet? I'm choosing to ignore its principle flaw, namely that bulls are male while I am not. Meh.
So, yesterday I talked about the possibility of doing something good today. A friend and I organized a workshop to promote awareness of and sensitivity toward non-heterosexual students in classrooms. We had tons of resources, a couple of simple activities, lots of info and I think for putting it together so quickly, we were pretty damn organized. Problem? You need people to present to. The first day we got no one. It wasn't surprising, but it was slightly disappointing. There was other stuff going on at the school, the announcement for our workshop was made very last minute (stupid school) and it was scheduled on a Friday. Like I said, not surprising. Today I had higher hopes. Several people told me they'd be there, they'd try to come out (no pun intended) but I guess that didn't work out for them. We got one person.
We didn't really talk about it or question it. When the time to start came, we started. Obviously we modified the presentation, but we hit on all of our main points and still took over an hour. I'm really happy we got to do the presentation at all. And I'm really happy that at least one person got something out of it. At the same time, it's still a bit disappointing.
I charged and I hit the wall... again. I do that a lot.
I'm reminded of a line from The Princess Diaries (the first one): "Wanting to rock the world but having zip power like me, that's a nightmare." Oh Lily, how right you are.
One day I shall wake from my nightmare and be a benevolent dictator. Yes, dictator. I've waited long enough for the power to affect change. I'm not sharing it when I get it.
Lauren.
The Cure for a Bad Week
I don't have much to say today. Only that the best cure for a week that's been frustrating, disappointing, draining and just all around bad is apparently sleep. I don't even remember what time I went to bed at last night and I slept clear through ten hours and another hour or two later on in the day. Everything is clearer when you're rested. Not that it helped make up my mind about anything, but it definitely helped with the crazy. Got those tendencies on lock.
Tomorrow I have the opportunity to do something good. Or, I suppose today. I'm a bit late writing this post. We'll see how it goes. Fingers crossed!
Lauren.
Friday, April 13, 2012
Not Enough
Aside from it being the second last Friday before the end of this year, nothing happened. And I'm happy with that. Too much shit has happened this week. A day without anything, good or bad, is perfect. I can't wait for this year to be over.
I was talking to one of my friends tonight and we honestly couldn't figure out why we were so tired, angry, frustrated and just... done. We both have an honours degree, we both participated in extra curricular activities, usually the same ones, our workloads were a little different but still demanding. And then this year comes along. It's one year and it feels like two BAs ganged up and kicked the snot out of me. I knew I would be able to handle the work load. And I have. That's not the hard part. The work itself isn't what you have to worry about. BEd is physically, mentally, spiritually, emotionally exhausting. Intellectually you're perfectly safe. Every other part of you is going to suffer.
I knew it would be hard, but I never expected it to be this hard. So, for anyone considering BEd, you will need to be determined, you're going to have to want it badly, you're going to have to be organized to within an inch of your life and be really anal with your time management abilities. You will need a lot of money, you will need to believe in a higher power (be that God, karma or justice) and the cyclical nature of that power. You will have to succeed on your own terms.
I was supposed to be considering taking Additional Qualifications. I was looking into French as a Second Language. Firstly, French is my first language so that annoys me, even if it's Teaching FSL. Then I looked at the dates and times of the course. It ran from 8:30AM to 4:30PM, Monday-Friday for a month. That made up my mind for me. HELL NO!
I'm barely making it through the last two weeks. I'm not doing an extra three. If it becomes a necessity later, I'll take it later. For the sake of my mental health, I am done as of Wednesday 26th at Noon.
I don't know if any of this made sense. That's how tired I am. But BEd. It had its moments, but if I could go back in time and had the choice of doing it over again, I don't think I would. That's just me. I don't want it enough.
Lauren.
I was talking to one of my friends tonight and we honestly couldn't figure out why we were so tired, angry, frustrated and just... done. We both have an honours degree, we both participated in extra curricular activities, usually the same ones, our workloads were a little different but still demanding. And then this year comes along. It's one year and it feels like two BAs ganged up and kicked the snot out of me. I knew I would be able to handle the work load. And I have. That's not the hard part. The work itself isn't what you have to worry about. BEd is physically, mentally, spiritually, emotionally exhausting. Intellectually you're perfectly safe. Every other part of you is going to suffer.
I knew it would be hard, but I never expected it to be this hard. So, for anyone considering BEd, you will need to be determined, you're going to have to want it badly, you're going to have to be organized to within an inch of your life and be really anal with your time management abilities. You will need a lot of money, you will need to believe in a higher power (be that God, karma or justice) and the cyclical nature of that power. You will have to succeed on your own terms.
I was supposed to be considering taking Additional Qualifications. I was looking into French as a Second Language. Firstly, French is my first language so that annoys me, even if it's Teaching FSL. Then I looked at the dates and times of the course. It ran from 8:30AM to 4:30PM, Monday-Friday for a month. That made up my mind for me. HELL NO!
I'm barely making it through the last two weeks. I'm not doing an extra three. If it becomes a necessity later, I'll take it later. For the sake of my mental health, I am done as of Wednesday 26th at Noon.
I don't know if any of this made sense. That's how tired I am. But BEd. It had its moments, but if I could go back in time and had the choice of doing it over again, I don't think I would. That's just me. I don't want it enough.
Lauren.
The Oscar for Best Actress of IS3 Goes to: Lauren Daily!
You may or may not have noticed, but yesterday was pretty much the mother of bad days. Between being rejected from grad school, receiving my credit card bill and getting a pretty shitty practice teaching report from my AT, I wasn't feeling all that enthusiastic about life.
But that was yesterday. I suppose I made lemonade after all. I refuse to wallow. I can write anywhere, I know I'm a good writer and apparently, I'm meant to be somewhere else, doing something else. I'm just pissed about having to find a new way of getting out of my hometown.
Regardless, I found an odd source of relief today. I usually hate my curriculum development and evaluation class. And I mean hate it. When I walked in, that hadn't changed. I was still in a bad mood about my PT report, I was tired because I was so mad that I hadn't gotten to sleep until late this morning and it turns out, I forgot to take my meds. It was a triple threat for trouble.
Our class picked up where it left off on Tuesday. We'd been split into subject areas, given nine students, given evaluations and told to write out their report cards. Today, my prof split our subject area groups in half. I was in the half that got sent to the cafeteria down the hall. When our prof reappeared, he had envelopes in his hands. Turns out we were going to be the parents of the nine imaginary students and our other classmates were going to be the teachers. Woot! Parent/Teacher night! In all of my prof's envelopes, he had our fake child's report card as well as our identities. I was Barbra. My husband was Stanley. He got to be the calm, level-headed one. My mission was to constantly be crying, be absolutely hysterical and get the teachers to divulge as much information as possible about a kid that was bullying my imaginary son.
I'm a shy person. I'm not usually very good at this sort of thing. I always break character because I'm too busy giggling nervously. That or I can never overcome the shyness and nerves to really embrace the character. Yeah... I have no clue what the hell happened today but my professor made sure to announce that my take on Barbara was far more dramatic than the Barbara of his other class and that I had won the Oscar. Alas, my prize was only in name and not in statue form. Seriously though, he could have given me a chocolate Oscar. After all, I succeeded in my mission!
 |
| Thank you! Oh, thank you! I wasn't expecting this! It's such an honour! Does anyone have a glass of milk? |
I was a complete lunatic. I yelled at people, I created a scene (twice), I talked circles around some teachers, I was wailing and fake crying... I really think that I lost my mind. I got half the teachers to tell me inappropriate things about the kid who was bullying my imaginary son. I also got a good portion of them to promise me some really inappropriate things regarding the bully. I had fun flustering a couple teachers. Then I got into a really loud fight with the parents of the child bullying my imaginary child. My husband Stanley would simply nod and agree with me, occasionally taking over the questioning of the teachers while I carried on. Our parent/teacher interviews were the longest, most dreaded and in the end, most annoying. I was jokingly offered Valium at the end of class. I take that as recognition of a job well done.
I act like an idiot all the time. I mumble snide comments all the time. My classmates know I'm a little silly. I don't think they were expecting what they got today. I think I genuinely scared a few of them. Truth be told, I'm a little scared too.
Beware to the children/parents/teachers/administrators dealing with my future children. I will go crazy on yo asses if my kids be bullied.
Lauren.
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
What To Do with Lemons
I'm sure at some point, we've all heard the saying "When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade". I got curious and started looking for the origin of this saying. I lost my patience before finding an answer. Why was I interested in this saying? Because it was a "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade"kind of day. To be frank, I'm starting to feel more like my life is a series of "God is a bully with a magnifying glass and I'm his favourite ant" kinds of days. But that's beside the point. We're talking about lemons.
So, what do you do when life gives you lemons?
Here's my suggestion. CAUTION: FOUL LANGUAGE AHEAD.
You take the lemons and carefully cut them in half. When all your lemons have been halved, you pick them up and with as much aggression as possible, whip them back at life. It will probably help if you say something along the lines of:
"Take your fucking lemons because I refuse to settle for the shitty-ass hand you've dealt me. Now fuck off!"
And hopefully, you've hit life square in the face, causing the acidic juices to escape the lemon halves, enter and burn life's eyes out.
This philosophy is called: Succeeding in spite of all the people who try to screw with you.
Pros: You eventually get what you want, you learn an awful lot along the way, you get to point and laugh and all the people who dared get in your way.
Cons: You will become jaded and when the moment comes, you likely won't want to point and laugh at the people who attempted to screw with you.
I have mastered this philosophy. The only remaining thing I want to tell life at the moment? Kiss my ass and come get your damn lemons because I've no use for them!
As you can see, I haven't had a very good day. I spent the day venting, I'm going to go to bed early, I'm going to wake up in the morning, I'm going to pick myself up and I'm going to move on and do what I do best. Because that's what you do. You don't take the lemons. You don't make lemonade.
Lauren.
So, what do you do when life gives you lemons?
Here's my suggestion. CAUTION: FOUL LANGUAGE AHEAD.
You take the lemons and carefully cut them in half. When all your lemons have been halved, you pick them up and with as much aggression as possible, whip them back at life. It will probably help if you say something along the lines of:
"Take your fucking lemons because I refuse to settle for the shitty-ass hand you've dealt me. Now fuck off!"
And hopefully, you've hit life square in the face, causing the acidic juices to escape the lemon halves, enter and burn life's eyes out.
 |
| I found this after I wrote my post. Clearly I'm not the only one receiving a lot of lemons. |
Pros: You eventually get what you want, you learn an awful lot along the way, you get to point and laugh and all the people who dared get in your way.
Cons: You will become jaded and when the moment comes, you likely won't want to point and laugh at the people who attempted to screw with you.
I have mastered this philosophy. The only remaining thing I want to tell life at the moment? Kiss my ass and come get your damn lemons because I've no use for them!
As you can see, I haven't had a very good day. I spent the day venting, I'm going to go to bed early, I'm going to wake up in the morning, I'm going to pick myself up and I'm going to move on and do what I do best. Because that's what you do. You don't take the lemons. You don't make lemonade.
Lauren.
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
A Letter to Glee's Writers
Dear Writers of Glee,
I regret to inform you, though my opinion likely means very little, that I was dissatisfied with tonight's episode. I found the music was lovely, as always, but there were several plot points I would like to draw your attention to.
Before I bring up my issues with the Finchel Wedding story, I must say that I'm infinitely glad that my minimum expectations regarding Quinn's accident were met. Hopefully you have heard the mass public outcry demanding an end to the insanity that is the wedding of diva Rachel and troglodyte Finn. Where I have a problem is that for some reason, this story is still going. It's limping, it's blind and it's crashing into things. It's time to put it down. Just... stop. I'm bored. Finn and Puck have a better romantic relationship. Should you feel the need to fill the relationship void, I would encourage you to elaborate on that. Actually! There is a more likely pairing that I think would please a vast number of viewers, myself included. In this regard, you could meet my ultimate expectations concerning Quinn's accident, namely a profession of love from Rachel to Quinn and an ensuing relationship with the latter. This pairing is typically called Faberry. Do look into it.
Moreover, while I'm on the topic of Quinn's accident, what an excellent job you did glancing over the whole incident. While I approve wholeheartedly of the "don't text and drive" message, I feel that you did not spend enough time expanding on the storyline you so clearly pulled out of your backsides. If you're going to end an episode with a dramatic and somewhat unexpected car crash, the least you could do is capitalize on the drama. Seriously, I waited seven weeks for a thirty second speech? If you could see my face... I am unimpressed. I'm going to add this for future reference, I disapprove of an Artie/Quinn relationship. Their mashed up name makes no sense... Quartie, Artinn? I don't like it. Thank you however for preserving a character that I've grown to like. I did enjoy the scene when Quinn was attempting to climb the wheelchair ramp. It was kind of adorable. More of that!
Amid all the missed potential of Quinn's accident, I'm left wondering why it was so important to meet Blaine's older, self-centered, bad actor of a brother? Girl hit by a car versus sibling rivalry. I would have directed my attention toward girl hit by a car. Particularly since that girl has survived a teenage pregnancy and a random "walk on the wild side". It's the messed up year of Quinn... no offence, but who gives a crap about Blaine right now?
Sue and the swim coach. I find it more irritating than funny. Sue facing a younger version of herself isn't very funny. One Sue is amusing. Two Sues is just too much. I'm also unsure why she wants a baby, why I should care and why if you're going to create a storyline, you refuse to develop it, but keep bringing it up. Are you having the Grey's Anatomy problem? You know, the one where you have so many characters with so many storylines that you can't cover any of them adequately anymore?
These are my complaints. I do hope, though I doubt you will, take them into consideration. Death to Finchel! Long Live Faberry!
Faberrily yours,
Lauren.
I regret to inform you, though my opinion likely means very little, that I was dissatisfied with tonight's episode. I found the music was lovely, as always, but there were several plot points I would like to draw your attention to.
Before I bring up my issues with the Finchel Wedding story, I must say that I'm infinitely glad that my minimum expectations regarding Quinn's accident were met. Hopefully you have heard the mass public outcry demanding an end to the insanity that is the wedding of diva Rachel and troglodyte Finn. Where I have a problem is that for some reason, this story is still going. It's limping, it's blind and it's crashing into things. It's time to put it down. Just... stop. I'm bored. Finn and Puck have a better romantic relationship. Should you feel the need to fill the relationship void, I would encourage you to elaborate on that. Actually! There is a more likely pairing that I think would please a vast number of viewers, myself included. In this regard, you could meet my ultimate expectations concerning Quinn's accident, namely a profession of love from Rachel to Quinn and an ensuing relationship with the latter. This pairing is typically called Faberry. Do look into it.
Moreover, while I'm on the topic of Quinn's accident, what an excellent job you did glancing over the whole incident. While I approve wholeheartedly of the "don't text and drive" message, I feel that you did not spend enough time expanding on the storyline you so clearly pulled out of your backsides. If you're going to end an episode with a dramatic and somewhat unexpected car crash, the least you could do is capitalize on the drama. Seriously, I waited seven weeks for a thirty second speech? If you could see my face... I am unimpressed. I'm going to add this for future reference, I disapprove of an Artie/Quinn relationship. Their mashed up name makes no sense... Quartie, Artinn? I don't like it. Thank you however for preserving a character that I've grown to like. I did enjoy the scene when Quinn was attempting to climb the wheelchair ramp. It was kind of adorable. More of that!
Amid all the missed potential of Quinn's accident, I'm left wondering why it was so important to meet Blaine's older, self-centered, bad actor of a brother? Girl hit by a car versus sibling rivalry. I would have directed my attention toward girl hit by a car. Particularly since that girl has survived a teenage pregnancy and a random "walk on the wild side". It's the messed up year of Quinn... no offence, but who gives a crap about Blaine right now?
Sue and the swim coach. I find it more irritating than funny. Sue facing a younger version of herself isn't very funny. One Sue is amusing. Two Sues is just too much. I'm also unsure why she wants a baby, why I should care and why if you're going to create a storyline, you refuse to develop it, but keep bringing it up. Are you having the Grey's Anatomy problem? You know, the one where you have so many characters with so many storylines that you can't cover any of them adequately anymore?
These are my complaints. I do hope, though I doubt you will, take them into consideration. Death to Finchel! Long Live Faberry!
Faberrily yours,
Lauren.
Monday, April 9, 2012
The Hunger Games Movie Review
Not your every day average Monday.
I finished my portfolio for my methods class and I'm quite happy with how it turned out. I think I look hire-able. Whether or not that is the case is not entirely up to me to decide.
Other than that exciting tidbit however, I went to see The Hunger Games. I felt the need to have a rounded Hunger Games experience. There were a few parts that surprised me. The main thing that surprised me wasn't even part of the movie. Suzanne Collins, author of The Hunger Games, was actually pretty involved with the movie. She co-wrote the screenplay, she was a producer and I think she did something else though I don't remember.
The reason I was so surprised (pleasantly) is that a great deal of the film, how can I put this, isn't explicitly stated in the book. In the back of your mind, you assume that it's happening, but you don't really think about it because of course, you're following Katniss around as she tries to survive The Games. I understand where these extra scenes are coming from. The book is a first person narrative that takes place largely in Katniss' head. The story develops as she thinks. To make a two hour movie out of her thoughts? Could be kind of long. I think coming at it from a more omniscient (kind of a pun) point of view helped situate viewers who were not familiar with the book. My dad still kept leaning over to ask questions, but he got the gist of it. I didn't explain nearly as much as I did when we first started watching Harry Potter movies. At the same time, I think adding the background, seeing the people of the Capitol actively participating, seeing them stage the games, did add to the movie. I think it helps to ground it in a reality that we understand, one that doesn't quite seem as awful as The Hunger Games really are. Because in the book, you don't see it as a game. It is survival, you don't see people intervening and playing God. In the movie, the conflict is more person to person. In the book you get the impression that anything could happen to these kids and no one would give a crap. In the book, there are people watching and in a twisted way, keeping them safe. In that way, I think the movie is more acceptable to popular audiences, to people who won't pick up the book and see what it's about.
Where my interest was really piqued (particularly after discovering Collins' involvement) was when I started making connections from The Hunger Games to The Mocking Jay. I started reading The Mocking Jay last night, the sequel to The Hunger Games. I would not be surprised to see a movie sequel. They've set up perfectly for it but not in an obnoxious, painfully obvious kind of way. It fits with the story they're telling. Which I think might have a great deal to do with having the original writer on staff.
I don't want to spoil anything, but I will admit to crying at one death, not something I do often. It wasn't a heaving, sobbing affair... but God! How could you not! And to those people who thought it was less effective given the chosen actor, you are fools! Fools I say!
Overall, a pretty faithful adaptation. It is sanitized to a degree. It doesn't feel like you're sitting there for nearly two and a half hours. Neither does it feel like you're constantly on edge. Oddly enough I thought casting Woody Harrelson as Haymitch was quite perfect. Sets were amazing. Stanley Tucci takes a minute to recognize. I think the message is even more blatant in the film version. So, definitely worth a watch, whether you're a fan or curious.
Lauren.
I finished my portfolio for my methods class and I'm quite happy with how it turned out. I think I look hire-able. Whether or not that is the case is not entirely up to me to decide.
Other than that exciting tidbit however, I went to see The Hunger Games. I felt the need to have a rounded Hunger Games experience. There were a few parts that surprised me. The main thing that surprised me wasn't even part of the movie. Suzanne Collins, author of The Hunger Games, was actually pretty involved with the movie. She co-wrote the screenplay, she was a producer and I think she did something else though I don't remember.
The reason I was so surprised (pleasantly) is that a great deal of the film, how can I put this, isn't explicitly stated in the book. In the back of your mind, you assume that it's happening, but you don't really think about it because of course, you're following Katniss around as she tries to survive The Games. I understand where these extra scenes are coming from. The book is a first person narrative that takes place largely in Katniss' head. The story develops as she thinks. To make a two hour movie out of her thoughts? Could be kind of long. I think coming at it from a more omniscient (kind of a pun) point of view helped situate viewers who were not familiar with the book. My dad still kept leaning over to ask questions, but he got the gist of it. I didn't explain nearly as much as I did when we first started watching Harry Potter movies. At the same time, I think adding the background, seeing the people of the Capitol actively participating, seeing them stage the games, did add to the movie. I think it helps to ground it in a reality that we understand, one that doesn't quite seem as awful as The Hunger Games really are. Because in the book, you don't see it as a game. It is survival, you don't see people intervening and playing God. In the movie, the conflict is more person to person. In the book you get the impression that anything could happen to these kids and no one would give a crap. In the book, there are people watching and in a twisted way, keeping them safe. In that way, I think the movie is more acceptable to popular audiences, to people who won't pick up the book and see what it's about.
Where my interest was really piqued (particularly after discovering Collins' involvement) was when I started making connections from The Hunger Games to The Mocking Jay. I started reading The Mocking Jay last night, the sequel to The Hunger Games. I would not be surprised to see a movie sequel. They've set up perfectly for it but not in an obnoxious, painfully obvious kind of way. It fits with the story they're telling. Which I think might have a great deal to do with having the original writer on staff.
I don't want to spoil anything, but I will admit to crying at one death, not something I do often. It wasn't a heaving, sobbing affair... but God! How could you not! And to those people who thought it was less effective given the chosen actor, you are fools! Fools I say!
Overall, a pretty faithful adaptation. It is sanitized to a degree. It doesn't feel like you're sitting there for nearly two and a half hours. Neither does it feel like you're constantly on edge. Oddly enough I thought casting Woody Harrelson as Haymitch was quite perfect. Sets were amazing. Stanley Tucci takes a minute to recognize. I think the message is even more blatant in the film version. So, definitely worth a watch, whether you're a fan or curious.
Lauren.
Sunday, April 8, 2012
The Elder/Younger Observation
Uh... It's Easter!
I did the family thing with my family. Sorry, was that obvious? Anyway, I learned something interesting. The older you are, the less you have to do. Unless you're the youngest... then no one expects you to do anything.
For instance, my mom desperately wanted cupcakes for Easter brunch. She cruised through her recipes and finally found one she liked. She presented me with it and asked if I'd bake them. So I did. Yes, not only did I finish reading The Hunger Games yesterday, I baked two dozen cupcakes. Now, cupcakes need icing. It's an unwritten rule or something. Turns out my sister made too much icing last time she made a cake. I unthawed it. Today, my mom came to get me to ice the cupcakes and decorate them. So I did.
I did not think that Easter required cupcakes.
Later, after we finished eating, my grandma guilted me into helping my mom do the dishes. So I did. My grandma sat at the kitchen counter and chatted with us. My sister retreated to the basement and pretended to be asleep.
I think it's a hierarchy thing. The elder has done it forever and finally achieves a period of respite. The younger well, they're coming in to their maturity and so are not expected to contribute. I'm apparently in the breaking in period.
I should say that I'm not complaining. I actually don't mind. Baking was fun and I like chatting with my grandma and goofing off with my mom. Besides, washing a few dishes isn't exactly difficult.
And then I did homework. A pretty well rounded day I think.
Happy Easter!
Lauren.
I did the family thing with my family. Sorry, was that obvious? Anyway, I learned something interesting. The older you are, the less you have to do. Unless you're the youngest... then no one expects you to do anything.
For instance, my mom desperately wanted cupcakes for Easter brunch. She cruised through her recipes and finally found one she liked. She presented me with it and asked if I'd bake them. So I did. Yes, not only did I finish reading The Hunger Games yesterday, I baked two dozen cupcakes. Now, cupcakes need icing. It's an unwritten rule or something. Turns out my sister made too much icing last time she made a cake. I unthawed it. Today, my mom came to get me to ice the cupcakes and decorate them. So I did.
I did not think that Easter required cupcakes.
Later, after we finished eating, my grandma guilted me into helping my mom do the dishes. So I did. My grandma sat at the kitchen counter and chatted with us. My sister retreated to the basement and pretended to be asleep.
I think it's a hierarchy thing. The elder has done it forever and finally achieves a period of respite. The younger well, they're coming in to their maturity and so are not expected to contribute. I'm apparently in the breaking in period.
I should say that I'm not complaining. I actually don't mind. Baking was fun and I like chatting with my grandma and goofing off with my mom. Besides, washing a few dishes isn't exactly difficult.
And then I did homework. A pretty well rounded day I think.
Happy Easter!
Lauren.
The Hunger Games Review
And in possibly the fastest review of my life, I've finished Book 1 of The Hunger Games Series. In other words I finished the book titled The Hunger Games.
Most of time, I question anything that has this much hype around it. And then I go and read the whole thing in a day. In my opinion, The Hunger Games actually deserves the hype. I haven't yet seen the movie, but it will be on my to-do list right after finishing off some of my pesky school work.
To be honest, I don't really know where to start with the review. Perhaps by saying that the book and the concept behind it is fascinating. Now, the book is set in... damn... what's that word... Basically, it's set after everything goes to hell and the world starts anew. There are twelve districts and as tribute to the Capitol, the central district, the other twelve have to supply two children between the ages of 12 and 18 to the Hunger Games. The Games, to put it simply, are a battle to the death between the 24 selected kids, which is televised for the entertainment of the people living in the Capitol.
I've heard all about the controversy. The two morons I have to listen to on the radio in the morning even bitched about it without having read it or seen the movie. Morons. It's wrong to have kids killing kids. It's graphic violence. It's twisted and wrong to televise murder. Yeah, because that hasn't happened already. Let me list some of the shows that I've watched and liked over the past few years:
Where are all the good (emphasis on good) sitcoms! Beside the point and do not get me started on horror movies. DO NOT! Either way, I realize that this is all fiction.
We talked about The Hunger Games in my English class. Apparently the idea came to be while author Suzanne Collins was watching the news and reality TV at the same time. The idea, the concept isn't new by any means. We're a society that thrives on three things: media, sex and violence. Tell me that kids don't kill kids (School shootings). Go for it (War zones). Try (Bullying). In a way, the world Collins created is already upon us. Think about it, while condemning the violence in The Hunger Games, we're still reading it. We are viewers of the Hunger Games as well and we're just as invested as any Capitol viewer. Kind of a brilliant twist to make readers complicit in the very thing that makes them cringe.
As for the gore, it's not as bad as I was expecting after talking to several people. Many of the deaths happen "off stage". Many of the killings committed by the main characters are either incidental, indirect or 'reasonable'. Morality and humanity are still very present in the book. They're a major theme. There is mercy, there is gratitude, there is defiance, there is love and caring and appreciation and disgust. Good, bad, the characters feel it all.
When I was on placement, I had a student approach me with his book and ask me if I'd read a passage for him. He was not reading The Hunger Games but others were. He said the passage made him uncomfortable and wanted my opinion about whether they should be reading that sort of thing in class. I read the passage, tried not to smirk and told him that I thought it was perfectly acceptable. He was stunned, asked me if I'd want my son reading it. I told him that I wouldn't mind and that if my son felt uncomfortable about his reading, that I'd love nothing more than to talk about it with him.
I think this is where we're failing kids as adults, parents and teachers. Kids aren't kids anymore. After age ten they're so media saturated that they're acting out behaviours years above where they are. So why not meet them at that level intellectually, actually trust them with content that will stimulate and make them uncomfortable. That's the point of literature. That's the point of learning. If you're uncomfortable, you're asking questions. If you're asking questions, you're learning. I feel like so much content in books is being censored now because we fear that kids aren't ready for it or because we're trying to be politically correct. But here's the thing, it was on TV first. This is why I'll never be able to teach in a classroom. I love controversy, I welcome it and use it. It's a tool! Think about it: Students already have a background of knowledge to draw on, they're engaged, they're already involved and it gets them thinking analytically and critically not only about the controversial element, but about how they feel about it. You're giving them the opportunity to develop intellectually as well as personally and socially. So there! Nothing was ever gained by being a chicken-shit.
The Hunger Games is brilliant social commentary. It's a fast read, it's an interesting read for boys and girls alike (and that's an accomplishment in itself) and it's a read with substance, that promises to get kids thinking. I would be thrilled to teach it in my classroom.
God, I've been at teacher's college too long. Final verdict: Definitely worth a read.
Lauren.
Most of time, I question anything that has this much hype around it. And then I go and read the whole thing in a day. In my opinion, The Hunger Games actually deserves the hype. I haven't yet seen the movie, but it will be on my to-do list right after finishing off some of my pesky school work.
To be honest, I don't really know where to start with the review. Perhaps by saying that the book and the concept behind it is fascinating. Now, the book is set in... damn... what's that word... Basically, it's set after everything goes to hell and the world starts anew. There are twelve districts and as tribute to the Capitol, the central district, the other twelve have to supply two children between the ages of 12 and 18 to the Hunger Games. The Games, to put it simply, are a battle to the death between the 24 selected kids, which is televised for the entertainment of the people living in the Capitol.
I've heard all about the controversy. The two morons I have to listen to on the radio in the morning even bitched about it without having read it or seen the movie. Morons. It's wrong to have kids killing kids. It's graphic violence. It's twisted and wrong to televise murder. Yeah, because that hasn't happened already. Let me list some of the shows that I've watched and liked over the past few years:
- CSI (doesn't matter which): All about murder, rape and being as graphic as you can on TV in a 9:00 o'clock time slot.
- NCIS (doesn't matter which): Again, all about murder and being as graphic as possible.
- SVU: Murder, rape, pedophilia and being as graphic as possible in a wide array of time zones, some beginning as early as 7:00pm.
- Veronica Mars: In all three seasons, main plot points consisted of murder, rape and this is a show for teens.
- Family Guy: People get shot and their bodies mutilated on an episode by episode basis. How many times has Joe Swanson had his legs eaten?
- Castle: Murder...
- Bones: Murder and graphicness
Where are all the good (emphasis on good) sitcoms! Beside the point and do not get me started on horror movies. DO NOT! Either way, I realize that this is all fiction.
We talked about The Hunger Games in my English class. Apparently the idea came to be while author Suzanne Collins was watching the news and reality TV at the same time. The idea, the concept isn't new by any means. We're a society that thrives on three things: media, sex and violence. Tell me that kids don't kill kids (School shootings). Go for it (War zones). Try (Bullying). In a way, the world Collins created is already upon us. Think about it, while condemning the violence in The Hunger Games, we're still reading it. We are viewers of the Hunger Games as well and we're just as invested as any Capitol viewer. Kind of a brilliant twist to make readers complicit in the very thing that makes them cringe.
As for the gore, it's not as bad as I was expecting after talking to several people. Many of the deaths happen "off stage". Many of the killings committed by the main characters are either incidental, indirect or 'reasonable'. Morality and humanity are still very present in the book. They're a major theme. There is mercy, there is gratitude, there is defiance, there is love and caring and appreciation and disgust. Good, bad, the characters feel it all.
When I was on placement, I had a student approach me with his book and ask me if I'd read a passage for him. He was not reading The Hunger Games but others were. He said the passage made him uncomfortable and wanted my opinion about whether they should be reading that sort of thing in class. I read the passage, tried not to smirk and told him that I thought it was perfectly acceptable. He was stunned, asked me if I'd want my son reading it. I told him that I wouldn't mind and that if my son felt uncomfortable about his reading, that I'd love nothing more than to talk about it with him.
I think this is where we're failing kids as adults, parents and teachers. Kids aren't kids anymore. After age ten they're so media saturated that they're acting out behaviours years above where they are. So why not meet them at that level intellectually, actually trust them with content that will stimulate and make them uncomfortable. That's the point of literature. That's the point of learning. If you're uncomfortable, you're asking questions. If you're asking questions, you're learning. I feel like so much content in books is being censored now because we fear that kids aren't ready for it or because we're trying to be politically correct. But here's the thing, it was on TV first. This is why I'll never be able to teach in a classroom. I love controversy, I welcome it and use it. It's a tool! Think about it: Students already have a background of knowledge to draw on, they're engaged, they're already involved and it gets them thinking analytically and critically not only about the controversial element, but about how they feel about it. You're giving them the opportunity to develop intellectually as well as personally and socially. So there! Nothing was ever gained by being a chicken-shit.
The Hunger Games is brilliant social commentary. It's a fast read, it's an interesting read for boys and girls alike (and that's an accomplishment in itself) and it's a read with substance, that promises to get kids thinking. I would be thrilled to teach it in my classroom.
God, I've been at teacher's college too long. Final verdict: Definitely worth a read.
Lauren.
Friday, April 6, 2012
Junk Mail Party
I don't know about you, but my Junk Mail folder is a constant source of amusement to me. No, I don't actually open the mail... that would be stupid. But the subject lines make me laugh.
If you have no idea what I'm talking about, here's an example of this morning's junk.
If you have no idea what I'm talking about, here's an example of this morning's junk.
Let's start from the beginning shall we?
Yesterday: I do not subscribe to Face or Fuck Book. What interesting books we have now! Regardless, I am not interested in yesterday's single college girls. I like my college girls freshly made every morning when I stop in at Timmies for my coffee. It's too bad we can't donate yesterday's girls to people in need.
5:14 AM: I was asleep at that time and so was not in need of, or searching for, a topless redhead. Though, on the bright side, I'm sure a topless redhead would attract tons of attention. She should get those dates no problem! After all, in Canada we believe in due process and all that fun legal stuff. She won't have to wait long before she sees a judge.
8:53 AM: Still sleeping. Not interested in Casino Games. Unless James Bond was at that casino and needed me to help with a mission. Crap! There's a red exclamation mark beside it! It must have been James. I'll pretend I didn't get the message and hope for the best.
8:56 AM: Am I covering my computer because James lost a bunch at the casino and I'll need insurance? Or am I covering it because Apple assumes I accepted a date with the redhead? I'm confused. Is it a threat? There's no red exclamation mark... And what am I covering my laptop with? If I cover it with a blanket the chances of me forgetting it's there and sitting on it increase. That must be why I need the insurance. Totally there again.
9:54 AM: I think that's just blatant false advertising. Why call it Fuck book if it's a dating site. I believe this is a flagrant attempt to rip me off. I'll not participate in this scam! Not until they fix their ad campaign. Imagine lying to innocent people...
11:30 AM: Ah Viagra. Well, given that I do not have a penis and am very unlikely to date someone with a penis, I don't think I'll be requiring your product. Thank you for your generous offer however. Should I meet someone with erectile difficulties, I'll pass along this wonderful opportunity.
11:45 AM: It's April. Why would I want to go through all the effort of losing weight only to gain it back as soon as summer hits. It seems completely contradictory. In spite of your idiotic tagline, I feel the need to thank you for assuming that I only have to lose 30 pounds. I must also regretfully inform you that should I choose to lose weight, I have no interest in finding it again by summer. I'll have to pass on your offer.
This is the kind of crap that runs through my head. I'd be mildly disturbed if it didn't happen so darn often... I kind of miss the ads offering to enlarge my manhood. Maybe I'll get one of those tomorrow. My favourite was "You could be bigger". Truth in advertising. It was quite refreshing.
Anyway, I'm off to read The Hunger Games. Finally started!
Lauren.
Thursday, April 5, 2012
Frantirexcited
I'm not sure what to think of today. It was a mixture of many things.
I'm tired and frankly, burnt out at this point. I'm fed up with school, group work and silly assignments that eat up time without contributing much to my knowledge base.
I do however, think that I've discovered my new career path. It will take more research, but for now, I have a general direction again and I like directions. I won't say what it is yet, but the irony will amuse anyone who knows me. Then again, how could it not be ironic? It's me we're talking about.
I'm also frustrated. Not with the usual stuff like being stuck in my hometown. Nope, today I'm frustrated with my family. Like many families (I assume) I love mine, but they're really pissing me off. My dad went off to Ottawa for some medical tests. They're keeping pretty tight-lipped about it which bothers me. Then there are issues between me and my parents, my sister and my parents... blah, blah, blah, there's tension and most of time, I feel like it all comes down on me. I'm everyone's sounding board and when something goes awry, I get to hear the "You could have done this..." speech. While the comment is made generally, sometimes to two or three of us, really, it usually means that I could do something more. Because I'm the one that's going to do it. And we go one pretending that that's not the case. Which aggravates me.
So, lots of tired and frustrated, but my brief, shining moment of conquest will carry me through! At least until Wednesday when I get to meet with Angela again.
Lauren
I'm tired and frankly, burnt out at this point. I'm fed up with school, group work and silly assignments that eat up time without contributing much to my knowledge base.
I do however, think that I've discovered my new career path. It will take more research, but for now, I have a general direction again and I like directions. I won't say what it is yet, but the irony will amuse anyone who knows me. Then again, how could it not be ironic? It's me we're talking about.
I'm also frustrated. Not with the usual stuff like being stuck in my hometown. Nope, today I'm frustrated with my family. Like many families (I assume) I love mine, but they're really pissing me off. My dad went off to Ottawa for some medical tests. They're keeping pretty tight-lipped about it which bothers me. Then there are issues between me and my parents, my sister and my parents... blah, blah, blah, there's tension and most of time, I feel like it all comes down on me. I'm everyone's sounding board and when something goes awry, I get to hear the "You could have done this..." speech. While the comment is made generally, sometimes to two or three of us, really, it usually means that I could do something more. Because I'm the one that's going to do it. And we go one pretending that that's not the case. Which aggravates me.
So, lots of tired and frustrated, but my brief, shining moment of conquest will carry me through! At least until Wednesday when I get to meet with Angela again.
Lauren
Smart Mouth Can't Judge
I was a busy bee today.
I was briefly related to Joni Mitchell. I talked to a prof about insanity. I talked to another about grad school. I confirmed to my entire history class that I am in fact female. I got a reference letter. I stalked my former AT and got a second reference letter. I debated walking home. I took the bus.
Just, so much going on.
I probably need to explain some of that...
Well, we had another guest speaker in today. He was teaching us his method of teaching history. Which actually is rather fascinating. What I understood from it anyway. He was kind of distracting. Either way, he gave us all an identity card. Our father was so and so, or ancestry was such and such, we lived here or there. Turns out my sister was Joni Mitchell. I knew my parents weren't always as clean cut as they appear! So, after he gives you your identity, you go through the standard grade 10 history units: WW1, 20s, Depression, WW2, Cold War. But! As he's teaching the units, things are happening to your character. You're moving up and down the social ladder. Sometimes you gain money and status, like I imagine I would have. Other times, your father dies in a factory accident and you're totally screwed. It gets kids invested in history.
While he was explaining his method, he stopped to talk about the big events in history and the time periods in which they fell. He explained the factors he chose to look at: economics, gender... Anyway, he gets to gender and he looks at me (he's probably only a foot away from me) and says: "...And if you're a female, they'll pay even less attention to you." He continued to stare at me. I was a tad uncomfortable because it continued for a prolonged period. Being me I replied: "I am in fact female". The class got a laugh out of it but most importantly, he stopped staring at me. Did I feel good about flustering an older man? No. But he was freaking me out! At least we're all clear on that one point though...
As for talking to a prof about insanity, given the lack of letter from a particular university, I've been considering my other options. I started looking into doing a master's in history. My prof told me that she'd be willing to help me put together a proposal and all that jazz and help me flesh out my idea for my major research paper. I'm not sure how she took my choice of topic. I think I saw surprise and approval... But yeah, so far I'm thinking of nineteenth century notions of insanity and women.
Also, something particularly strange happened to me. I'd just purchased some goodies at the Timmies and was walking back to class. I was in a pretty good mood and feeling a little silly, so I did a little hop-skip. I skip in the halls all the time. No one ever pays attention. Until today. Some girl saw me, I have no idea who she is, stopped me, and said: "Oh my God! That was the happiest thing I've ever seen! Thank you!" I frowned and I'm pretty sure the look on my face said something along the lines of WTF? but I thought about the situation some more. I was skipping in the halls. Did I really have a right to judge?
So, that was my day. Weird and full of randomosity. Just how I like my day.
Lauren.
I was briefly related to Joni Mitchell. I talked to a prof about insanity. I talked to another about grad school. I confirmed to my entire history class that I am in fact female. I got a reference letter. I stalked my former AT and got a second reference letter. I debated walking home. I took the bus.
Just, so much going on.
I probably need to explain some of that...
Well, we had another guest speaker in today. He was teaching us his method of teaching history. Which actually is rather fascinating. What I understood from it anyway. He was kind of distracting. Either way, he gave us all an identity card. Our father was so and so, or ancestry was such and such, we lived here or there. Turns out my sister was Joni Mitchell. I knew my parents weren't always as clean cut as they appear! So, after he gives you your identity, you go through the standard grade 10 history units: WW1, 20s, Depression, WW2, Cold War. But! As he's teaching the units, things are happening to your character. You're moving up and down the social ladder. Sometimes you gain money and status, like I imagine I would have. Other times, your father dies in a factory accident and you're totally screwed. It gets kids invested in history.
While he was explaining his method, he stopped to talk about the big events in history and the time periods in which they fell. He explained the factors he chose to look at: economics, gender... Anyway, he gets to gender and he looks at me (he's probably only a foot away from me) and says: "...And if you're a female, they'll pay even less attention to you." He continued to stare at me. I was a tad uncomfortable because it continued for a prolonged period. Being me I replied: "I am in fact female". The class got a laugh out of it but most importantly, he stopped staring at me. Did I feel good about flustering an older man? No. But he was freaking me out! At least we're all clear on that one point though...
As for talking to a prof about insanity, given the lack of letter from a particular university, I've been considering my other options. I started looking into doing a master's in history. My prof told me that she'd be willing to help me put together a proposal and all that jazz and help me flesh out my idea for my major research paper. I'm not sure how she took my choice of topic. I think I saw surprise and approval... But yeah, so far I'm thinking of nineteenth century notions of insanity and women.
Also, something particularly strange happened to me. I'd just purchased some goodies at the Timmies and was walking back to class. I was in a pretty good mood and feeling a little silly, so I did a little hop-skip. I skip in the halls all the time. No one ever pays attention. Until today. Some girl saw me, I have no idea who she is, stopped me, and said: "Oh my God! That was the happiest thing I've ever seen! Thank you!" I frowned and I'm pretty sure the look on my face said something along the lines of WTF? but I thought about the situation some more. I was skipping in the halls. Did I really have a right to judge?
So, that was my day. Weird and full of randomosity. Just how I like my day.
Lauren.
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
Unfunny Moments of Funny
I either missed my calling, or, I'm a monster. It's up in the air.
- after killing a man because he sat in your chair? (It's your chair dammit!)
- after eating the contents of the dairy section of your local super market? (Stress sucks dammit!)
- after making your class laugh during a presentation on child abuse? (Child abuse is wrong dammit!)
All of the above really. But wait! That last one doesn't make sense.
And yet, that's what I managed to do. When I'm stressed, uncomfortable or anxious a number of things happen. I might start talking a lot, like A LOT, and very quickly. I might giggle nervously after absolutely everything I say. It's extremely annoying. I might act like a complete goofball. Yes, it actually gets worse when I'm stressed. Or, I might make a lot of sarcastic, dark, snide, inappropriate remarks. Today I was apparently in the mood to make sarcastic, dark, snide and inappropriate remarks.
I'm pretty much stressed to my breaking point. Putting me up in front of a classroom full of people... not the greatest idea. So, first, I would like to state with absolute clarity that I do not condone child abuse. Children are innocent people who only have love to give and who give it freely. Anyone who abuses that should be taught the meaning of abuse, should be made to suffer what they've inflicted on a child. It's not a laughing matter.
Until of course I come in.
For neglect I said: Picture Harry Potter living in the cupboard under the stairs.
For warning signs of neglect, I said: If the kid is really thin, like beanpole thin, it might be a sign of abuse. Well, not necessarily I suppose... some people are fortunate enough to have that body type, but skeletal thin, that's a problem. You should watch for that.
For sexual abuse I said: It doesn't matter if the child is consenting to sexual acts because our laws protect minors and they can't legally consent to sexual acts until they reach the age of 16 (or 18 when the sexual act involves exploitation by a person in a position of authority or trust). So if you have a fourteen year old girl telling you that she wants to have sex with a thirty eight year old man, tell her that you don't care because she's a child and that's gross.
I'm so eloquent it's stunning. And I'm not at all biased.
On the one hand, I think our presentation needed a bit of levity and if my awkward ramblings brought that... well, mission accomplished. The material and the topic make for a heavy, emotionally draining talk. It's hard to sit through without getting that little reprieve. At the same time, I hope it didn't seem like I was making light of a very serious, damaging and all too common subject.
Stupid anxiety! Oddly enough, those two words kind of sum up the whole day. In an attempt to avoid crushing stress tomorrow, I'm off to bed.
Remember: Child abuse is no laughing matter. Stop it when you can. It's our social responsibility.
Lauren.
Monday, April 2, 2012
Mobbed: It's Nice!
I had an interesting thing happen to me today. I was mobbed. By children.
I returned to my placement to give the students all of their graded work back. The second I walked into the gym, one girl jumped up off the floor, shouted "Miss Daily!" and ran at me. That got all the other kids running. I was surrounded within six seconds. Kids were running across the gym, jumping off stage! Pandemonium! I briefly wondered if Lady Gaga or someone had walked in behind me because I don't usually elicit that reaction by walking into a room. One girl caught me by surprise and hugged me so hard I thought she was going to lift me off the ground. And I am not a light. I'm a bench pressing goal for Olympian weight lifters. I was fist bumped and taught new fist bumps (but denied the exploding fist bump... I'm unsure why), they begged me to stay until the end of the day and all kinds of things until my AT called everyone back to attention. I must say, in spite of being really surprised and taken off guard, it was rather nice.
I got to spend some time with my former students, making fun of the play they're putting on. Because I'm that great of a role model. I accidentally gave the evil genius of the group the bright idea to use the Spanish pronunciation of Jesus. Given that they're presenting the Passion of Jesus Christ, I don't think "Heyseuss" will go over very well. Hopefully she stays faithful to our agreement... not like the kid I explained Plan B to...
Incidentally, I don't think I talked about this, what is the difference between boys and girls? Ask a boy what Plan B is and then ask a girl. Answers, in my experience, will be as follows:
Boy: It's a skateboard.
Girl: It's a form of "emergency contraception". (The quote is from the Plan B website. I'm not mocking it.)
Yet another reason for teens to put off having sex for as long as possible.
And no, I was not discussing contraceptive methods with fourteen year olds. I was in the class with three students. The only male student mentioned Plan B. I looked up from my work, saw one girl smirking at me and I knew what she was thinking because it's what I was thinking. By why the hell would he bring that up. I asked him what Plan B was and he informed me that it was a skateboard brand. I started laughing, as did the girl, and when she refused to explain the joke to him, I told him why we were laughing so that he at least had correct information. I knew I shouldn't have, but I would prefer he hear the right answer than some off the wall fabrication. I asked them not to mention it to my AT who was not fond of my liberal biases. It was the first thing he told her upon seeing her next. I kind of wanted to head-desk.
Either way, I really enjoyed seeing them all again. They're so funny and smart and thoughtful. Just very cool people. Plus, they made me feel like a rockstar which doesn't happen all that often. I wasn't having a bad day, but it gave me a boost anyway. I MISS MY KIDS! (Yes, they are mine!)
And when my AT declined writing me a letter of recommendation, I could laugh about it. And I did. Our teaching styles are so vastly different that I don't think her endorsement would help me much. The EA is writing me a letter and I'm perfectly happy with that. I think she knows me better anyway.
So, new experiences, explored career options, did some homework, I call to day productive.
Lauren.
I returned to my placement to give the students all of their graded work back. The second I walked into the gym, one girl jumped up off the floor, shouted "Miss Daily!" and ran at me. That got all the other kids running. I was surrounded within six seconds. Kids were running across the gym, jumping off stage! Pandemonium! I briefly wondered if Lady Gaga or someone had walked in behind me because I don't usually elicit that reaction by walking into a room. One girl caught me by surprise and hugged me so hard I thought she was going to lift me off the ground. And I am not a light. I'm a bench pressing goal for Olympian weight lifters. I was fist bumped and taught new fist bumps (but denied the exploding fist bump... I'm unsure why), they begged me to stay until the end of the day and all kinds of things until my AT called everyone back to attention. I must say, in spite of being really surprised and taken off guard, it was rather nice.
I got to spend some time with my former students, making fun of the play they're putting on. Because I'm that great of a role model. I accidentally gave the evil genius of the group the bright idea to use the Spanish pronunciation of Jesus. Given that they're presenting the Passion of Jesus Christ, I don't think "Heyseuss" will go over very well. Hopefully she stays faithful to our agreement... not like the kid I explained Plan B to...
Incidentally, I don't think I talked about this, what is the difference between boys and girls? Ask a boy what Plan B is and then ask a girl. Answers, in my experience, will be as follows:
Boy: It's a skateboard.
Girl: It's a form of "emergency contraception". (The quote is from the Plan B website. I'm not mocking it.)
Yet another reason for teens to put off having sex for as long as possible.
And no, I was not discussing contraceptive methods with fourteen year olds. I was in the class with three students. The only male student mentioned Plan B. I looked up from my work, saw one girl smirking at me and I knew what she was thinking because it's what I was thinking. By why the hell would he bring that up. I asked him what Plan B was and he informed me that it was a skateboard brand. I started laughing, as did the girl, and when she refused to explain the joke to him, I told him why we were laughing so that he at least had correct information. I knew I shouldn't have, but I would prefer he hear the right answer than some off the wall fabrication. I asked them not to mention it to my AT who was not fond of my liberal biases. It was the first thing he told her upon seeing her next. I kind of wanted to head-desk.
Either way, I really enjoyed seeing them all again. They're so funny and smart and thoughtful. Just very cool people. Plus, they made me feel like a rockstar which doesn't happen all that often. I wasn't having a bad day, but it gave me a boost anyway. I MISS MY KIDS! (Yes, they are mine!)
And when my AT declined writing me a letter of recommendation, I could laugh about it. And I did. Our teaching styles are so vastly different that I don't think her endorsement would help me much. The EA is writing me a letter and I'm perfectly happy with that. I think she knows me better anyway.
So, new experiences, explored career options, did some homework, I call to day productive.
Lauren.
Sunday, April 1, 2012
Have you had a Productive Day?
I think I'm going to have to invent a rating scale to determine what kind of day it's been. I'm unsure what it would look like... but maybe something along the lines of:
1= got out of bed (Comatose Day)
2= got out of bed and bathed (Lazy Day)
3= got out of bed, attended to hygiene and tidied (Somewhat Productive)
4= got out of bed at reasonable hour, bathed, cleaned, made all meals (Productive)
5= got out of bed at reasonable hour, bathed, cleaned, made 2 meals and completed work related task (Quite Productive)
6= got out of bed early, bathed quickly, cleaned, made 2 meals, froze leftovers for busy weekday ahead, completed multiple work related tasks. (Very Productive)
7= got out of bed early, bathed quickly, cleaned, made 2 meals, made meals in advance, cleaned again, completed multiple work related tasks, went out with friends. (Busy Day)
8= got out of bed early, bathed quickly, cleaned, made 3 meals, made meals in advance, cleaned again, completed multiple work related tasks, did laundry and dealt with a family crisis. (Really Busy Day)
9= got out of bed after sleeping only 4 hours, bathed quickly, cleaned, made 3 meals, made meals in advance, ate at two of those meals, cleaned again, completed multiple work related tasks, did laundry, finished a home renovation project, dealt with friend drama and voted for favourite couple on Dancing with the Stars. (About Ready to Explode)
10= got out of bed after only sleeping 4 hours, bathed as quickly as possible, tidied, made three meals, made meals in advance, ate one meal, cleaned again, completed all work related tasks, did all laundry including folding and putting away, fixed botched home renovation project, dealt with crazy family member, voted for favourite couple on Dancing with the Stars while knitting a sweater made of home-spun yarn. (LIAR!)
My day would be about a 3,5. I got out of bed at a reasonable hour, made my lunch, completed some school work, tidied a bit. Given how much I actually have to do, my day should have probably been a 5 or a 6. By the way, this scale only works for Saturdays and Sundays. I'd have to invent a whole other one with weekday tasks... Dang it! I just realized. Dancing with the Stars doesn't do votes on the weekend. Let's just ignore this continuity issue. Hey, today's a 3,5... I'm not fixin' it. I have already fulfilled my obligations. At least I colour coded. Red means you explode. Because liars will not be tolerated.
Lauren.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)